Pirates to Pyramids: Las Vegas Taxi Tales Read Online Free Page B
Author: JJ Carlson, George Bunescu, Sylvia Carlson
Open up the door, said the doorman.
Me: Nope.
He: Why?
Me: Look at her.
He: What? What do you mean?
Me: She looks green. You better stand back. I think she is going to vomit on you.
He turned just in time to see her start to hurl and did not want that anywhere, especially on him.
Me: Push her up to that potted plant, fast. He managed, just in time, poor plant, and then came back, thanked and rewarded me with a different carload. Not my first rodeo.
2) On a different night several security officers escorted four drunks out to my car. Same thing, I put the door locks down. I was not opening this time, either. The reason was so obvious I was shocked they had not all seen it.
One of the drunks thought he was funny so he continued wrestling with his buddies all the way out to my car. When security heard I was not taking them because they were not behaved enough to ride in my car, they laughed and said "smart driver." Then they turned to the alcohol impaired group and said, "Get off our property" and pointed them out to the street.
3) It is against the law to take a cab if you don’t have money. Riders are responsible for the cash and the correct change, too. It is the same as a city bus; just try to get that driver to make change. Most cabbies are helpful and carry some change and some companies do take credit cards. But when you forget your money or ran out and you still owe the cabbie, life can get interesting and, or inconvenient in a hurry.
A) You can get taken to a bank or ATM (with meter still running)
B) You can get escorted to your room by security officer (smart cabbies don't take your word that you will come back and the meter is still running)
C) You can find the police arriving on the scene.
D) You can give a possession of value to the driver as payment or, in lieu of payment, and redeemable from the cab company. This possession could be your watch, wallet, DMV ID, iPod, cell phone, PDA, camera. These are usually available 24 hrs per day at the taxi office.
So, a guy at this same hotel was escorted to my cab and after I screened the doorman, in he got. And he immediately, loudly yelled “You dumbshit,” and again and again. He assured me there would be no "other trouble tonight." My mind said “other?” He told me his story
He was a "friend" of a member of the entourage of a female film star. The star, a once scandalous girl gone straight, made her name in scary pictures. And, no, he was not intimate with her. But he wanted to be closer to her. So it was his bright idea to bring a gram or more of cocaine to party like "a player "at the hottest nightclub in Las Vegas, at that time. Only, he got real stupid (his words) after he got drunk on alcohol and started openly offering coke to others in the club.
This was guaranteed to make a big impression, the wrong impression on the wrong people: the management and security. As he tells it, he was yanked out of the club, one of the most desirable hotspots in town, into the cold dank security office.
Here he met the entire senior security staff, and the President/ Manager of the hotel. They took turns grilling him.
"Where did you get the coke?"
"Was it in the hotel?"
"Where? When? Who?" They grilled him over and over again. What an enjoyable drug.
Finally, after satisfying them that it had nothing to do with their hotel they said it was "time to call the city police, unless he just wanted them to flush it all,"
So now you know who he had called "a dumbshit" when he got in my car. It wasn't me. And he might be a dumbshit but he was a dumbshit who now was free to leave. He just never could return again.
They have his picture in their computer. Just like a celebrity.
HAPPY DRUNKS
Happy drunks are common in Las Vegas. I think the happiest of them all are the Brits! They are, my favorites, by far, because they are not amateurs. Brits are such good drinkers that they can still amuse themselves even
Me: Nope.
He: Why?
Me: Look at her.
He: What? What do you mean?
Me: She looks green. You better stand back. I think she is going to vomit on you.
He turned just in time to see her start to hurl and did not want that anywhere, especially on him.
Me: Push her up to that potted plant, fast. He managed, just in time, poor plant, and then came back, thanked and rewarded me with a different carload. Not my first rodeo.
2) On a different night several security officers escorted four drunks out to my car. Same thing, I put the door locks down. I was not opening this time, either. The reason was so obvious I was shocked they had not all seen it.
One of the drunks thought he was funny so he continued wrestling with his buddies all the way out to my car. When security heard I was not taking them because they were not behaved enough to ride in my car, they laughed and said "smart driver." Then they turned to the alcohol impaired group and said, "Get off our property" and pointed them out to the street.
3) It is against the law to take a cab if you don’t have money. Riders are responsible for the cash and the correct change, too. It is the same as a city bus; just try to get that driver to make change. Most cabbies are helpful and carry some change and some companies do take credit cards. But when you forget your money or ran out and you still owe the cabbie, life can get interesting and, or inconvenient in a hurry.
A) You can get taken to a bank or ATM (with meter still running)
B) You can get escorted to your room by security officer (smart cabbies don't take your word that you will come back and the meter is still running)
C) You can find the police arriving on the scene.
D) You can give a possession of value to the driver as payment or, in lieu of payment, and redeemable from the cab company. This possession could be your watch, wallet, DMV ID, iPod, cell phone, PDA, camera. These are usually available 24 hrs per day at the taxi office.
So, a guy at this same hotel was escorted to my cab and after I screened the doorman, in he got. And he immediately, loudly yelled “You dumbshit,” and again and again. He assured me there would be no "other trouble tonight." My mind said “other?” He told me his story
He was a "friend" of a member of the entourage of a female film star. The star, a once scandalous girl gone straight, made her name in scary pictures. And, no, he was not intimate with her. But he wanted to be closer to her. So it was his bright idea to bring a gram or more of cocaine to party like "a player "at the hottest nightclub in Las Vegas, at that time. Only, he got real stupid (his words) after he got drunk on alcohol and started openly offering coke to others in the club.
This was guaranteed to make a big impression, the wrong impression on the wrong people: the management and security. As he tells it, he was yanked out of the club, one of the most desirable hotspots in town, into the cold dank security office.
Here he met the entire senior security staff, and the President/ Manager of the hotel. They took turns grilling him.
"Where did you get the coke?"
"Was it in the hotel?"
"Where? When? Who?" They grilled him over and over again. What an enjoyable drug.
Finally, after satisfying them that it had nothing to do with their hotel they said it was "time to call the city police, unless he just wanted them to flush it all,"
So now you know who he had called "a dumbshit" when he got in my car. It wasn't me. And he might be a dumbshit but he was a dumbshit who now was free to leave. He just never could return again.
They have his picture in their computer. Just like a celebrity.
HAPPY DRUNKS
Happy drunks are common in Las Vegas. I think the happiest of them all are the Brits! They are, my favorites, by far, because they are not amateurs. Brits are such good drinkers that they can still amuse themselves even
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