Out of Such Darkness Read Online Free

as the next man fumbles his coins, drops one and scratches around on the floor before finally fingering it into the slot.
    By the time he reaches the booth, Jay has observed the previous callers and memorised the process for getting a connection. With the sweaty instrument snapped to his ear, he listens for the ringing tone. He notices dregs of spittle in the mouthpiece.
    ‘Hello?’ The voice on the other end is unknown to him and cautious.
    He thinks that in his panic he has he pressed the buttons in the wrong order. ‘Who’s that?’
    ‘This is the Halprin house. Who
is
this?’ The woman who’s answering sounds scared.
    ‘Where’s Rachel? Who’s
that
?’ He looks up at a woman in a fuchsia-pink jacket who stands behind. She’s listening and tutting at his lack of progress.
    ‘This is, Katy from next door. Is this … Jay?’
    ‘Katy. Where’s Rachel? It’s Jay.’ There’s a scream at the other end. ‘Jay? Mr Halprin?’
    ‘Yes.’
    ‘Rachel! Rachel! Here, quickly! It’s him. It’s your husband.’ He hears a scraping noise. Rachel says something indistinct in the background, then Jay hears Katy more clearly: ‘Thank God! Quickly, Rachel. It’s him.’
    Rachel’s voice is a monotone. Is it the shock of his resurrection? ‘Where are you? Your mobile’s dead. Why haven’t you called?’
    ‘I’ve been on a train, Rache. I saw it. I saw it fly in.’ He’s choking the words out. The woman in pink looks away. ‘I saw it and ran.’ This is only part of the burden weighing him down – his survival adds so much more.
    ‘We thought you were dead. I’ve been waiting for somebody to tell me. Katy’s come to sit with me.’ She’s weeping and the sound of it makes Jay’s throat constrict.
    ‘I would have been.’ Something within him dredges up the notion that perhaps he was always going to miss the train. He dismisses it and says, ‘Can you come and get me? I’m at New Canaan station.’
    Rachel sniffs. He pictures her taking a grip of herself. ‘Why New Canaan?’
    ‘I’ll explain when you’re here.’
    ‘Okay, I’m on my way.’
    ‘Thanks, Rache.’ He replaces the handset on its rest and the woman in pink steps forward. He looks at her eye to eye. It’s no matter to either of them that there are tears tracking down his cheeks.
    He spies a Starbucks across the road. The backs of jackets and blouses are pressed flat against the windows and people are crowding round the door. The rest of the town is deserted. When he reaches the doorway, he sees that someone has rigged up a television. Nobody is serving or drinking coffee. A gaggle of women in T-shirts and jeans detach themselves from the interior and come out shaking their heads, their chins in their chests. They have smudges of mascara under their red-rimmed eyes.
    The group round the door eases and Jay is inside. The onion-bitterness of body odour makes it smell like a cheap hamburger joint. All eyes are fixed on the screen.
    ‘How bad is it?’ Jay asks nobody in particular. ‘I’ve just got off the train.’
    The man in front of him, who’s wearing UPS brown overalls, answers from the side of his mouth, cocking his head so that he doesn’t miss anything. ‘Poor souls have been jumping.’
    He tries to interpret what this means. Where from? Why? ‘I’ve missed it. I only know about the accident – the plane, the tower.’
    The man turns to him. ‘Two of ’em. Two planes. Look. They’ve got both towers – that’s both towers burning. Motherfuckers!’
    Nobody in the room reacts to the profanity. Plumes of white smoke are curling up from both buildings. He shakes his head. ‘They’ll get them off with helicopters, right?’
    ‘It’s too hot. They got no chance – those poor fuckers on the roof. If they were above it they’re–’
    Toast!
Jay jerks his head back in reaction to the word that sprung out from his brain. He thanks God he didn’t say it aloud. But he can’t stop his mind throwing this stuff at