new counselors is standing out there on the shady step.
âDoes Gladys Pittman live here?â she says.
âCertainly does,â I say.
âIâm a girl who used to write her letters.â
âOh. You are?â
I was so surprised. And then in the very next instant I werenât surprised at all. That happens sometimes, one moment is so strange you feel youâre dreaming, then something shifts and you feel âof course. It makes sense.â Like you were expecting it.
âIâm her sister,â I told the girl, and she says, âIvy, right?â
So Gladys mustâve mentioned me at least once.
âThatâs right,â I say. âIâm Ivy, now come on in for a soda pop.â
She was a pretty little thing, but not real healthy looking, with dark circles under big eyes, pale skin, long curly brown hair, and nervous to the point you want to send her up to Doctor Wichert for a Valium. She had on a big T-shirt with some rock stars on it, the sleeves cut off near her shoulder and near the one shoulder a blue angel tattoo I hoped was a rub-on. Even though it was chilly, she wore a pair of blue jean fringy shorts like they all wear in summer, with her long legs scratched up from the woods and then these little pink Chinese slippers on her feet when most of the girls wore sturdy sneakers or hiking boots. Also she wore baby pink socks to match. On her big-eyed face was some eyeliner and a little blue shadow, and it just made her look younger and paler.
I gave her a soda pop and sat at the table with her thinking Gladys was going to walk in any second. She was only out back on the stoop drinking ice water. We were on break between lunch and dinner. Gladys liked to sit out there alone in the shade on the cool cement steps. Sheâd pull on an old sweater. Usually she read a book, and maybe had an afternoon highball. Iâd see her look up from her book and into the spring light for a second. In the distance we still had snow on the mountains. Sheâd squint at that bright white. Then it was back to the book.
Raelene was not easy to talk to that day. She was polite, but not easy, not cheerful, and it was like she was afraid to say, âWhereâs Gladys?â Like she was worried I was going to tell her, âGladys is dead.â
So I hear the door opening and we both look toward it and Gladys is stepping inside still in her uniform and sheâs put her head under the garden hose, so her hair is plastered down. She had her wire-frame glasses on, but she still squinted at Raelene. She werenât at all used to having visitors.
âWhoâs this?â she said, and walked to the sink. She filled her glass with water, her back to us, and Raelene looked right down at her own long folded fingers.
âItâs Raelene,â I said. âThe girl who wrote you all those years. The little girl who prayed for Wendell.â I remember saying Wendell because I think it was the first time his name got said in that house in seven years. At the sound of it I could feel Gladys stiffen over there at the sink.
Raeleneâs dark eyes were even bigger now and she looked at Gladys and said, âIâm just starting to work at the camp now, so thought Iâd say hello. Itâs been a while.â
The poor girlâs face was red now, and she was smiling right through her embarrassment. And she had her chin lifted, she was a proud girl, she werenât about to sit there and let the embarrassment win, not Raelene.
Gladys slowly turned around, then said, âWell hello.â I think Gladys almost smiled. It seemed like I could hear Raeleneâs heart pounding behind the rock stars on the little cage of her chest.
A silence falls, and Iâm coughing to fill it. Iâm the one always taking care of awkwardness.
Raelene said, âThe lakes are real pretty around here.â
Gladys said, âSure are, if you like lakes.â
Finally Gladys sat