Miss Klute Is a Hoot! Read Online Free

“She’s got such a hangdog look on her face.”
    â€œShe’s a dog ,” I said. “She’s supposed to have a hangdog look on her face.”
    â€œMy mother is a psychologist,” Andrea said. “She told me that Miss Klute has all the classic signs of depression.”
    â€œWhat?!” Neil said. “Dogs don’t get depressed.”
    â€œHow do you know?” Andrea replied. “Maybe dogs are just like people, but with paws and fur.”
    â€œAre you saying that our therapy dog needs therapy?” asked Alexia.
    â€œShe might,” Andrea replied. “I think we should try to cheer her up.”
    Maybe Andrea was right. Miss Klute did look kind of sad most of the time.
    After lunch we decided to skip recess and go to Mr. Macky’s office instead. Miss Klute was sitting on the floor in there, looking sad as usual.
    â€œWhat can I do for you kids?” Mr. Macky asked us.
    â€œCan we be alone with Miss Klute for a few minutes?” asked Andrea.
    â€œHow come?” asked Mr. Macky.
    â€œWe have to tell her something,” I explained. “It’s personal. Please? Please? Please?”
    â€œUh, okay, I guess,” Mr. Macky said. “I’ll be in the teachers’ lounge.”
    â€œOkay, what are we gonna do to cheer Miss Klute up?” Ryan asked after Mr. Macky left.
    â€œWe could tell her jokes,” suggested Alexia. “You know lots of them, A.J. Go ahead, tell her one.”
    â€œOkay,” I said, getting down on the floor next to Miss Klute’s ear. “Do you know why the skeleton didn’t go to the school dance?”
    â€œWhy?” everybody asked.
    â€œHe had no body to go with,” I said.
    We all looked at Miss Klute. She just sat there, looking sad.
    â€œTry another joke, A.J.,” said Neil.
    â€œOkay,” I said. “Do you know which football team travels with the most luggage? The Green Bay Packers! Get it? Luggage? Packers?”

    Miss Klute just sat there, looking sad.
    â€œShe really is depressed,” I said. “Those are my best jokes.”
    â€œDo you know any dog jokes?” Andrea asked. “Maybe she needs jokes she can relate to.”
    â€œOkay,” I said. “How are dogs and marine biologists alike?”
    â€œHow?” everybody asked.
    â€œOne wags her tail, and the other tags her whale.”
    Miss Klute just sat there, looking sad.
    â€œWhat kind of dog does Dracula have?” I said.
    â€œWhat kind?” everybody asked.
    â€œA bloodhound.”
    Miss Klute just sat there, looking sad.
    â€œWhat do you get if you cross a cocker spaniel, a poodle, and a rooster?” I said.
    â€œWhat?” everybody asked.
    â€œA cockerpoodledoo!”
    Miss Klute just sat there, looking sad.
    â€œThose jokes are horrible , Arlo,” Andrea said. “I think you made her even more depressed than she was before.”
    â€œWell, if you’re so smart, let’s see you try to cheer her up,” I told Andrea.
    â€œMaybe she would like it if I danced for her,” suggested Andrea. “I just started taking Irish step-dancing classes after school.”
    Andrea takes classes in everything after school. If they gave a class in nose picking, she would probably take that class so she would get better at it.
    We all rolled our eyes as Andrea danced around Mr. Macky’s office. It was weird. And it didn’t seem to have any effect on Miss Klute. She just sat there staring at Andrea.
    â€œSee? You can’t cheer her up either,” I said.
    â€œMaybe she doesn’t want to be a therapy dog,” said Alexia. “Did you ever think of that? Maybe she wants to be a Seeing Eye dog.”
    â€œOr a firehouse dog,” said Neil. “That would be cool.”
    â€œMaybe she wishes she was a cat,” I said.
    â€œPoor Miss Klute,” Ryan said, wrapping his arms around her. “She’s cooped up in here all