Love Made Me Do It Read Online Free

ground.  But this time I got back up.  He put me in a backwards choke hold.  Covering, my nose and mouth.  He pinned me down to the ground.  With his body weight anchoring me down, I started feeling dizzy.  If I didn’t get away, he was going to kill me.  The thought of dying gave me the strength I needed.
    I managed to reach the front door.  He was right behind me. He grabbed the back of my shirt, making it rip from my body.  But that didn’t stop me.  I pushed thru the darkness like the devil was on my heels. I was calling out for help.  A neighbor heard me and let me in. “Please, let me use your phone!”
    I was half naked from the waist up and out of breath.  I covered up my chest and dialed my lover’s number.  He answered. “Please bring me a tee shirt and meet me in the back.”  A few minutes later, my lover was there.  He hugged and held me.  “Are you ok?”  “I am now.” 
    My lover made me feel so comfortable.  He never asked what happened.  But I’m sure he knew.  I was thankful that he came and saved me.  I didn’t have any concerns about my fiancé finding me.  We ordered pizza and put in a movie.  I was trying to put everything out of my head and relax.
    Then the phone rang, and rang, and rang a few more times. I loved the fact that he was so into me and not his phone. Then that damn phone rang one more time.  This was the ring that was heard around the world.
    He jumped up to go get it.  He listened for a moment, and then waved me to the phone.  All I heard was my ex’s slurred speech thru what sounded like spit bubbles. “Do you love her?”  “Are you with her right now?”  Then he yelled “give me back my girl!”
    I wanted to laugh.  Then I wanted to cry. I took the phone and hung it up. It commenced to ringing while we made love.  I didn’t want my fiancé anymore.  I had lost interest.  He would just have to deal with it.  It was okay when he cheated.  But not when I did?  How ironic.
    Do I attempt to rectify my relationship?  Or do I further indulge in the possibility of a forever situation with my lover? I had a decision that needed to be made. I wouldn’t be able to rest easy knowing that I was leaving so many loose ends. I decided the best thing to do was to figure out if my relationship could be fixed. If it couldn’t, then I needed to end it properly. So I stopped everything.
    I stopped calling my lover.  I stopped seeing my lover, and I stopped all my emotions towards my lover. I went back to a mediocre existence. I worked and came home.  My main focus point was repairing my relationship.  My fiancé really tried to play his part too. He got a job, made some better friends and curbed his alcohol intake. I loved him enough to give him this opportunity.  But truthfully I was scared of him.  I was scared that if I did anything wrong he might kill me.
    Although our mission to reconnect had been a mutual goal, something was missing.  There was no love. That had been replaced with fear.  It was a complacent existence.  I was just going along, so that no one would be hurt. Physically or mentally. I did my best to play nice, but every second I dreamed of my lover coming to rescue me.
    Months went by and I continued to ignore calls and pages from my lover.  Until, right before New Year’s Eve 1999.  Our house phone rang with a call from an unknown caller.  I picked up and I heard is voice.  “Can you talk?”  “I can’t stop thinking about you.” I gasped for air, with my heart pounding.  I replied. “I’ll call you later.”  It was back on.  I was going to make sure, that it had a better beginning than before.
    I reflected for a whole week, before I decided to have the conversation with my fiancé. At dinner I told him he should move on. I would give him no more than a month to get everything together and leave. He said ok.  A few days went by; we didn’t speak, sleep or eat together. It was nice.  But really eerie.  I