It Had to Be You Read Online Free Page A

Oliver’s sexual needs enough. Not that he ever was that demanding you understand. We made love three times a week, that’s average isn’t it? Well it was always enough for me, I never complained.
    ‘ If you ask me, he doesn’t want to commit. It’s easier for him if you leave, that makes more sense. He probably feels you’re too good for him. You’ve over loved you see,’ says Muffy with an authoritative tone of someone who knows what she’s talking about.
    I don ’t see in the least. In fact, I’m having great difficultly seeing altogether with my blood engorged eye that stings like mad. I’m sure it is deteriorating by the second. It must be the stress. Surely if Oliver didn’t want to commit he wouldn’t be looking at rings in Hatton Garden would he? Suddenly a terrible thought enters my head. What if he wasn’t looking at rings at all? Oh, my God, he was most likely looking for some very expensive jewellery for Miss Brown Nipples. Oh how could he?
    ‘ You’re stereotypical , that’s your problem,’ continues Muffy.
    Great, at least there is a name for someone like me.
    ‘Can you take a pill for that?’ I ask cynically.
    ‘ You’re blaming yourself already aren’t you?’ fumes Muffy, launching into her favourite topic, the complex dipstick male mind. ‘He’ll do anything to wriggle out of …’
    She stops and stares at my eye.
    ‘Jesus Christ, how did that happen?’
    ‘ A Christmas tree,’ I say flatly.
    She jumps up and slaps her thigh.
    ‘God,’ she thunders. ‘He went at you with a bloody Christmas tree. What a sodding brute. You should report it Binki, like now ,’ she thrusts a mobile at me. I point out I’m already holding one.
    ‘ I got a needle in my eye from the tree I brought home. Oliver could barely untangle himself from the sheets let alone go at me with a tree. He’s got a bad back remember?’
    She scoffs.
    ‘That didn’t stop him humping some bimbo did it?’
    ‘ I’m surprised she didn’t send it into spasm. You should have seen the size of her tits.’
    Don ’t think about her tits Binki. Think about something else, anything else, but not tits.
    ‘ Pity he didn’t go into anaphylactic shock, swallow his tongue and die,’ says Muffy evilly.
    I gawp at her, blimey that ’s a bit harsh. Death by tongue swallowing, even I wouldn’t wish that on Oliver, and I’m feeling worse by the minute. It’s Christmas Eve and it has been a day of award-winning horror, definitely worthy of a film. Maybe Carey Mulligan could play me.
    ‘ You need to change your pattern of thinking. You still believe being in love means being in pain. You were expecting him to propose weren’t you? Instead you find him balls deep with some floozy from work,’ she says nonchalantly, biting into a mince pie.
    ‘ You were the one who told me he was in Hatton Garden,’ I say defensively.
    ‘ It all stems from problems in your childhood,’ Muffy spouts, cracking open a walnut.
    I knew my mother was to blame for something.
    ‘Did you see yourself as a co-dependent?’ asks Muffy, looking at me intently.
    ‘ Only on M&Ms,’ I answer honestly.
    I feel like I ’m having a therapist’s session. I wonder if this has something to do with the fishnet tights and suspenders. Oliver has a fetish for them, that and pirate outfits, but I always felt stupid with them on. I struggle to remember if Brown Nipples was wearing anything pirate related. No, I feel quite sure she was wearing absolutely nothing and feel the mince pie lurch up my diaphragm. I must put the whole thing out of my mind. Oh God, all the presents we were taking to my parents are back at the flat, as of course are my clothes.
    ‘ You’ll have to go back and get my clothes,’ I blurt out, ‘and the Christmas presents.’
    Her mouth drops open.
    ‘I can’t go there, what if … Well you know, what if she is still there?’
    God, I don ’t believe this.
    ‘ Tell her to bugger off if she is.’
    I shudder at the memory of