âFor ten thou?â¦for twenty?â¦for fifty then?â¦you telling me you wouldnât knock off someone you donât know for a half million if you knew it was fairly easy?â and then if thatâs the case he should have let the matter go and got on with his life and if he saw them by accident like on the road then he just should have told the cops where it was and leave it at that and at most hope for the best and if it was in some place where the guys were still there, then where, but to keep his body completely out of it.
His wife visits him a few months after heâs in, though he wrote and spoke to her answering machine plenty of times to come, without hearing anything back, and she says sheâd like a divorce and hopes he wonât try to stop it and he says he doesnât want one, of course, but he put her through such misery like leaving her stranded and almost broke and with their oldest child, besides the even worse misery by far she had over losing Julie while at the same time seeing him go nuts in his own misery and over finding those guys, that anything she wants heâll give, every single dime in the bank and whatever assets and possessions they still might have and things like that and any arrangements she wants to make with him over Margo heâll sign, though he hopes sheâll bring the kid to him here or have someone do it a few times a year, and she remarries a short while later and has a daughter who in a few years is the age Julie was when that guy killed her.
His ex-sister-in-law brings Margo to see him in prison about once a year once the girl turns twelve and then when sheâs eighteen she visits him on her own because she wants to or knows how much he wants her to and feels sorry for him and is just responding to his begging letters for her to come for sheâs all he has he says in them, all he ever will and just a few hours with her makes the next few months till her next visit so much better for him, and itâs usually uncomfortable between them for the two hours sheâs thereâthey could have more time but he can tell by her fidgeting and face that those two hours are a little more than she can tolerateâand they donât talk to each other much and he mostly stares at her not looking or looking at everything but him and says when he says anything, and then it often becomes a sort of running-mouth thing, how nice she looks and bigger and even prettier sheâs getting, all things he knows daddies, or âfathersâ now because sheâs of that age, are almost supposed to be saying but with her itâs altogether true, and mature sheâs sounding and also mature in lots of other good ways and how nice her clothes are or how theyâre the perfect choice for her looks and physique and the weather today and how itâs not so bad in here, she didnât ask but heâll give her his semiannual report anyway if she doesnât mind, the other prisoners still leave him alone for the most part for they know itâs what he wants after all he went through, and how much it means to him that sheâs here sitting opposite him, he can hardly believe it after wishing for it so much the last three months and he apologizes if coming here was a lot of trouble and cost her more than she could afford or stopped her from doing something or being with someone she wanted to be with or do much more, itâs okay though, he was a kid once, or a young man he should say if heâs going to get their age comparisons right, so he understands and he wonât ever forget that she comes here pretty regularly, that she comes here at all, even, and he knows itâs not the greatest place to see oneâs dad and he appreciates the effort she made in coming here but he said that, and at least once every time sheâs there he suddenly starts bawling, first sniveling, then trying to hold it back, then flat-out crying or bawling but over