In Denial Read Online Free Page A

Adam did all he could for Lucinda’s mother and father, for Charlotte and Timothy’s grandparents, but they had aged before his very eyes as he no doubt had aged in others’ eyes.
    There were no wills, no last wishes.
    How could a thirteen year-old girl and a fourteen-year old boy have last wishes? They had their lives ahead of them, they had their futures to think about. And Lucinda …
    Poor, poor Lucinda.
    Wherever she was, she would be blaming herself; she would feel totally responsible. Even when Charlotte or Timothy fell off their bikes, scuffed their knees or cut a finger, had a headache or a cold, Lucinda always felt responsible.
    Adam could not have asked for a better wife, or the children for a better mother. She was - had been - the epitome of a living angel, always seeing good in people before she saw the bad, always preaching the positive before the negative, always acknowledging the advantages rather than the disadvantages of doing something.
    Yes, Lucinda had been an angel.
     
    *  *  *
     
    ‘ Have you finished, Mr Harrison?’
    Adam had not heard Doris come back into the snug. He looked up. ‘Yes, yes I’ve finished, thank you. That was delicious.’
    Rather than pick up his plate and leave him alone once again, Doris pulled out the chair opposite him and sat down. ‘We had somebody like you in here ‘bout five years ago,’ she said quietly.
    ‘ Somebody like me?’ Adam repeated automatically, but not really caring what Doris meant. She had interrupted his thoughts which were so precious.
    ‘ Oh, yes, just like you. He was like a lost soul as well.’
    ‘ A lost soul? You make me sound like some sort of itinerant ghost.’
    ‘ Isn’t that what you are?’
    ‘ I’m sorry, Doris, but you’ve lost me. I’m tired after a long drive. That was a delicious meal but now I just want to go to bed.’
    Doris picked up the empty plate but did not stand up. ‘I asked earlier why you were here, but then said it was none of my business. It is still none of my business but if you are in need of somebody to listen, somebody to perhaps share whatever is troubling you, then …’
    ‘ You are very kind, Doris, but … but it’s too late for all of that.’
    ‘ It’s never too late.’
    ‘ I can assure you, Doris, for me it is too late.’
    Doris put the plate back on the table. ‘Mr Harrison, I’ve been running this place for more years than I care to remember. I have seen thousands of people come and go, most of them I wouldn’t recognise if I saw them again. They come, they stay and sometimes they eat but then they go, usually after paying, but not always.’ She chuckled. ‘They’re my livelihood. On occasions, and such occasions are becoming more and more rare, somebody stays and I think they are special. They are different. Do you want to know what Sid said to me when he came to get me out of the parlour after you’d asked for a room?’
    Adam was none too happy with the fact that he was being talked to and about, but even unhappier with the way the conversation - if that’s what it was - was going. He didn’t need to be analysed, and especially by some hotelier he didn’t know from Adam - or should that be Eve? It was all too late for analysis.
    But even with the need to be left alone, the need for isolation, the need for escapism, Adam could not be rude. And for some reason he wanted Doris to remind him of his mother, not necessarily to look at … Doris had such a caring attitude; she spoke softly and used her hands and there was sincerity in her eyes. If he could remember his mother, which he could not, he would have wanted her to have been like that.
    ‘ No, Doris, what did Sid say to you?’
    ‘ Sid isn’t one for sussing out people quickly, in fact Sid doesn’t do anything very quickly, but he’s a good barman. I can leave him on his own when I need to.’ Doris rested her elbows on the table and leaned forward, as if about to share a secret. ‘He described you as being