Grin and Bear It: How to Be Happy No Matter What Reality Throws Your Way Read Online Free

spoken about it. When I sat down to write this book, I realized how damaging my actions really were.
    You know what finally changed everything? I fell in love for the very first time with a fair-haired all-American boy; someone I’d dated on and off for six years. Feeling special, loved, attractive, and desired I thought This is the man I’m going to marry .
    The movie Braveheart changed all that. After my boyfriend saw it for the nineteenth and twentieth time, I started getting concerned he was going to change his name to William Wallace, the unlikely hero whose courage and honor changed his country’s history. One man making a big difference is, I’m sure, what inspired him to go to Zimbabwe or Uganda to teach. That’s when I got a “Dear Jenni” letter from one of those countries that said something about how he needed a princess he could sweep off her feet and I was not that girl.
    How many times can you hear “not good enough”? Over the years, I would hear it on a loop: “The Big Three.” Let me give you an early example:
    You’d think that the experience I had as the mascot back in high school would have been enough to keep me from ever doing it again, but I was determined to keep my mascot dream alive. As a way of showing my true school spirit, I set my sights on becoming UCLA’s mighty Bruin Bear. I thought to have any chance, I would have to do something so crazy and outrageous to get their attention they’d have no choice but to award me the coveted bear suit. I had a brilliant idea. When I got in front of the judges, I pretended to pee on our rival, the USC Trojan. Yes, this Bruin Bear wannabe gave an imaginary Tommy Trojan, the revered symbol of USC, a golden shower. Why didn’t they select me?
    All this time I absolutely believed that I was destined to appear on Saturday Night Live. This dream kept me going, and eerie connections to the show were everywhere. I had dated Will Forte in college for a couple of months. (Of course, at the time, I didn’t know he would end up on SNL !) Not long after Will and I broke up, I was fixed up on a date with a guy who told me his brother was going to be on SNL while we were riding a Ferris wheel.

    Lambda Chi date party—UCLA with Will Forte. Which one of these people will end up on Saturday Night Live?

    “I’m going to be on SNL , too!” I blurted out, totally believing it.
    A few weeks later, his brother made his official SNL debut. It was Will Ferrell. Seeing him on the show and recognizing his immense talent motivated me more than ever. His comedy fearlessly flew without a net in skits like “Dissing Your Dog Pet Training Video,” “Janet Reno’s Dance Party with her D.O.J. (Dances of Janet),” and the unforgettable “Spartan Cheerleaders of East Lake High” who cheered on the ping-pong and chess teams. I was going to find a way to someday share the stage at the infamous NBC Studio 8H.
    Around my junior year, I thought that I’d spent enough time working my way up at the Groundlings and it was finally my chance to be a part of the troupe.
    To become one of the thirty official members, you had to audition. My hopes were high of joining this company whose members write and perform in their theater shows and teach classes at the school. One of the instructors there decided to crush my dream. For the audition, I had created a character called Carol Pitts. She was a talkative, nerdy office worker whose life revolved around sex and syntax errors. She would have imaginary orgasms with her imaginary boyfriend in her very real office cubicle panting, “I love him. I hate him. I love him. I hate him.” It didn’t go over well.
    “Lorne Michaels would love you because you have big tits and a high squeaky voice, but you’re not funny!” the teacher said after I finished my scene.
    Ouch.
    Maybe she didn’t like other funny women?
    Surely she didn’t really mean what she was saying.
    How could she?
    Chris Kattan, who was already in the company,