God Emperor of Didcot Read Online Free

have proven, through science, that the addition of cow’s milk to tea causes a chemical synthesis, producing enzymes conducive to high levels of moral fibre. And we all know how essential moral fibre is in strengthening the morale, wisdom, bravery and downright decency of citizens everywhere.
    ‘Following the discovery of the proper way of drinking tea, the First Empire remained unbeatable in battle, conquering a wide range of scoundrels, despots and foreigners with the help of unlimited tea. However, the golden age of tea was not to last.’
    The music became sombre, and the screen now depicted a group of feeble-looking aesthetes sipping some sort of cream-topped, sprinkle-spattered drink, like an anaemic dropping in a cup. On the edge of the picture, a pot-bellied lout swilled pop from a can.
    ‘During the period of decline leading to the tyranny of the World Government, tea was discouraged in what historians now see as a concerted and malign effort to poison the resolve of the Imperial People. Insidious corporations foisted unnatural drinks made of coffee and syrup on the demoralised populace. For that dark period the future of man was decided by others, until the Imperial Revolution and the fall of the Over-Empire. Now, we may rest assured that the strong arm of the honest tea drinker will never again be made skinny by the latte of foreign oppressors.’
    The music changed again, this time to brisk Walton. A pair of citizens, a woman and a man, ran through a meadow hand in hand. ‘This is the future,’ W’s voice said. ‘Your future. The Empire lies in the hands of citizens like you, people ready to fight to defend democracy and decency from alien aggression.’ The man and woman had climbed a small hill, now dawn broke over them. The woman was pointing at something out of shot, while the man poured from a teapot. ‘We shall go forward and face our foes with weapons in one hand, mugs in the other. Let those who seek to oppress us remember that a storm is brewing.’
    ‘Jerusalem’ played, and the flag reappeared on the screen. Smith stood up instinctively, realised that no one else was standing and sat down. The lights came up.
    ‘Stirring stuff,’ said Smith.
    ‘It’s consumption of tea that makes t’army strong,’ Hebblethwaite said. ‘And, I may say, what makes your British worker the finest int’ Empire, if not int’ whole galaxy.’
    Hattie nodded. ‘Statistical analysis of historical data indicates that moral fibre raises the efficacy of combat troops between twenty-four and sixty percent. Moral fibre is estimated as thirty percent more effective than numerical superiority, selective breeding, honour codes, religious fanaticism, and so forth.’ Her calm, dead eyes fixed on Smith. ‘The most effective factor in the development of elite troops is moral fibre.’
    ‘And moral fibre comes from tea,’ said W.
    ‘Good lord. Well, I’ll remember to have more of the stuff,’ Smith said, uncertain how he could do this without wiring himself up to a drip. ‘But where do we come into this?’
    ‘You need to see how tea production is managed on a galactic scale,’ W said, rooting about on his desk. ‘We need to look at the Empire as a whole. There should be a holographic projector here somewhere. . . and I put a map under it. Here we are.’
    He tugged out an Ordnance Survey map of Known Space and opened it up. ‘Now, this large pink area in the middle is the Empire. At present, the main battlefront is down here, along these systems. Here, from Cerberus to Pleides, is where the main attack is expected to come, and where we’ve sent most of our heavy ships ready to meet the Ghasts head-on.’
    ‘Splendid,’ said Smith. He was familiar with the battlefront.
    ‘And here, near the border, is the Didcot System.’
    Smith was particularly familiar with this dot: Rhianna was stationed there. He knew the distance from Didcot to a variety of other places, just in case he was going past and could find