Flesh: Part Twelve (The Flesh Series Book 12) Read Online Free

original chart from Flesh
at least half a dozen times.” His face goes serious.
    My
mouth falls open. I'm astonished that he has looked at my chart that
many times since we met.
    “ It
might have gotten a little higher.” There's no masking the
uncertainty in my voice. I'm definitely trying to put on a brave
front, and we both know it.
    His
grin broadens into a smile, and this time it's definitely amused. He
leans forward to kiss my forehead, and I wince away though I don't
know why. “See, already scared that I might hurt you.”
    “ Am
not!” I pout.
    He
sighs, staring at me thoughtfully. “Can't we just leave this as
it is? I'm giving you most of what you want. Let me have this.”
    I
don't want him to have it though. Because if I let him have it, it
means that I'll always be sharing him in one way or another. That
thought hurts. I should be enough for him.
    “ No.”
I cross my arms over my chest again. “I want to see what you do
to those girls. I want to know that...” That
you're not seducing them. That you're not touching them
inappropriately. That you don't look at them the same way that you
look at me. All
impossible things when I'm switching places with them. Because it's
not the same. It will never be the same.
    “ I
don't want you to know.” He shakes his head slowly.
    “ Then
I should leave.” I nod decidedly. If he won't let me at least
attempt to bear this weight for him. If he doesn't even want to give
me a chance to try to be his everything, then I'd rather be nothing
to him.
    His
expression softens. “You have to be the most stubborn woman
I've ever met.”
    “ Touche.”
I roll my eyes. “Minus the woman part, of course.”
    I
expect him to finally give up. To let me go. We both know this isn't
working. It's a constant battle to make each other happy, and it's
pretty obvious at this point that we're never going to win. But then
he says, “I'll show you.”
    “ You
will?” My heart leaps in my chest, half from joy and half from
fear. Part of me knows that I just signed a check that my ass
probably can't cash, but I don't care. He's giving in to me, and at
this moment, it's all that matters.
    “ After
we eat.” He rounds the table to sit back down. “The food
is getting cold. That's one thing I hate about lobster. Leave it for
five minutes and it turns room temperature.”
    I could not care
less about the lobster. I'm so overjoyed that I've made some progress
on the topic of Lucian and Flesh. If I can just endure whatever he
does to me, then most of our problems will be solved. He'll give up
Flesh, and we can finally have something close to a normal
relationship.

CHAPTER THREE

    For as much
conversation as we had at the beginning of our meal, the rest of
dinner is spent in silence. I stare across the table at Lucian while
he eats. He looks contemplative like he's going over in his head
exactly what he's going to do to me. My mind is aflutter with
possibilities as well.
    Every BDSM video
I've ever seen plays through my head like a montage of pain and
pleasure. Janice has shown me some pretty seedy stuff. Humiliation
the likes of which no person should ever have to endure. Lashings
that about broke the skin. Needles and knives and a dozen other
things I'd never want to try. Am I really ready for this? Am I ready
to see Lucian Reddick's worst?
    I try not to think
about it as I push broccoli around on my plate. Even though I'm not
hungry, I force the lobster down. If my stomach didn't feel so tight
from anticipation, I would probably be savoring every bite. Lucian
knocked the ball out of the park again with his cooking. How he
manages to make healthy food taste delectable, I'll never understand,
but I'm very appreciative of it.
    “ You should
finish your food.” He nods at my plate. “You're going to
need your strength.”
    I scowl at the
broccoli like it's my enemy before doing what I'm told. Lord knows
what I'll need my strength for, but I'm not going to doubt him.
Besides, it feels