Fates' Folly Read Online Free Page B

would want me to do is insult Cerberus. Plus, if I
was quick about it, no one would ever know.
    I got up and quietly, cautiously and casually
walked to the desk, reached over to the basket and picked up a
honey bun, not making one sound other than a hushed crinkle of
cellophane. I slowly turned around and came face to face with
Cerberus.
    Of course, I didn't know it was Cerberus at
the time. She, yes I said she, was dressed as a beautiful woman- a
woman with long legs that were very visible in the tiny hot pink
skirt she was wearing. I don't believe the skirt consisted of
enough material to cover one of my ass cheeks, but it was
beautiful. She was also wearing a matching jacket made of equal, if
not less, materiel than the skirt. The jacket's only button was
clasped just below her very large breasts; breasts that were barely
contained in a gold lacy bra that, if I'm being honest, I would
tell you was lovely and complimented her creamy brown skin and long
blonde hair.
    I finally managed to stop staring at her
breasts- not an easy task. Because of height difference, they were
basically in my face- and looked up into her big brown eyes that
were looking down at me in a very unfriendly way.
    "Whoa oh… hi. Would you like a honey bun?" I
held out the delicacy. She didn't say anything, just tilted her
head a little to the left and sniffed. Just like my golden
retriever Butterscotch used to do when he was curious. That's when
it hit me.
    Oh shit!
    "Oh shit," I said at the same time I thought
it. Sometimes my brain and mouth work simultaneously.
    Cerberus tilted her head to the right and
sniffed again.
    "You know, you're never going to pass for a
woman if you keep doing that," I said, before covering my
mouth.
    I was an idiot and somehow thought if I
covered my mouth it would change or cancel the fact that I had
probably just pissed off a three headed dog, who was dressed as a
woman, who was so dangerous I was told not to look at her, much
less take her goodies or talk to her.
    I waited for her to bite my head off,
literally. She just stared, frowning slightly. I opened the honey
bun, hell I already screwed up and was probably about to be mauled,
might as well eat the damn honey bun.
    "Mmmm. I love honey buns." Brain, mouth-
working simultaneously again.
    "Me too," she said, in a deep throaty
voice.
    I reached behind me and grabbed another one,
handing it to her. She smiled, a little toothy but a smile none the
less. We stood there eating our honey buns in silence.
    "Would you like another?" she asked, her
voice low and husky.
    I took a deep breath. "Sure, but maybe we
should sit down and have some coffee with them, you know, to help
balance out all the sugar."
    She tilted her head again but moved to sit
behind the desk and started filling two styrofoam cups.
    I took a few steadying breaths while I looked
for another chair. I felt like I had just avoided a horrifically
violent event. Not for the first time in my life, I silently
thanked the gods for the creation of honey buns. The fact that
Cerberus was all wrapped up in pink and gold wrapping did nothing
to minimize the terror I felt in her presence- in some ways, the
pretty packaging made it worse.
    I pulled up the chair I had been sitting in
up to the front of her desk. Cerberus set my coffee in front of me
with a bowl of creamers, a cup of sugar cubes and the basket of
honey buns.
    "So," I said, dropping three sugar cubes in
my coffee, "Do you go by Cerberus, in the form you are in now?
Which is beautiful by the way, very amazon queen/ runway
model."
    Cerberus blushed. "Really, you think so? I've
worked so hard on this body. You should have seen me six centuries
ago. I was still twenty feet tall. I was hoping to get a little
smaller, but it takes a lot of godly powers to contain this girl,"
she said, patting her hair like the best drag queen I'd ever seen-
who was John Leguizamo in that To Wong Foo movie.
    "I hope you don't get offended and eat me,
but just so I'm clear, you are