Everyday Ghosts Read Online Free Page A

I’ve loved you since I was a kid. Will you sign my field book?”
    â€œOh, for the love of God,” cried Father Gabriel.
    Officer Stingo placed his pen to his pad, poised to write. “Could you describe this ox-cart, sir?” he asked.
    The officers searched the abbey and the grounds with Father Gabriel following them, waving his arms and shoutinginstructions that they ignored. They covered the yard and searched the barn. “Loose planks back here too, sir,” said Officer Lund, tapping at the wall behind the trough. “Oh, get on with it, get on with it!” said Father Gabriel. They looked inside cabinets and under pews, into teapots and holy vessels. They opened the door of every cell and searched under every bed. No sign of an intruder was found.
    But he was still there somewhere, Pete was sure of it. At first it was only a feeling. Then there were signs. The next day, after he washed the kitchen floor and was starting on the refectory, he heard a clanging sound behind him. He hurried back to the kitchen and found footprints tracking across the wet floor,leading out the rear door. The footprints were shaped like two half moons with curlicue patterns of circles and lines. At night he heard a stirring outside his cell. At first he thought it might be Brother Dominic, but there was no knock, and then he caught a whiff of smoke. He hurried to the door and peered into the hall. It was empty. But it was the strange kind of emptiness left behind in the split second after someone had just been there.
    That was a kind of emptiness Pete knew. All his life he had been aware of it. If his faith was true, it meant there was a hidden presence in everything. As a boy he thought if he looked hard enough, he would be able to see it. As he grew, he knew this was wrong. Faith meant not needing to see. The presence was therebut escaped ordinary senses. Then Pete lived in a constant state of almost seeing. Every place was like a room where a bright light had just gone off. Always, Pete felt he could almost see what was left of that light, which still burned elsewhere. It made everything he looked at seem fleeting, like passing birds glimpsed from the corner of the eye. He scanned the world’s surface and thought it was like staring into a big blank sky filled with beautiful clouds that were too high, or too deep, or too far away to be evident. To believe they were there all the same was the only way he knew to find that the world was not empty.
    The footprints he had seen in the kitchen, thought Pete, were exactly the kind a sneaker would leave.

10
    Everything appeared to return to normal, for what that was worth. If anything, things got better. The brothers were all in high spirits. Even Brother James and Brother Matthew greeted Pete with good cheer as they passed. At choir, everyone sang in clear and faithful voices. Days went by in which Brother Walter had no run-ins with the ants. Brother John’s twisted hands straightened out a little, and Brother Frederic’s sayings tended a bit more toward the New Testament. All the while, there were odd comings and goings, and Pete had no idea what it all meant.
    Father Gabriel took to his room. Hours of prayer went on as usual, thoughwith few in attendance. Pete went into the church for the afternoon mass to find no one there but Brother Louis, who was kneeling at a front pew. Pete had not seen him since that day on the hill. He looked up at the ceiling when he heard Pete come in. Pete knew there was no point in asking him where everybody was. Even if he were not under a vow of silence, Brother Louis would not waste his breath on Pete.
    Brother Louis drew himself up and slowly walked with his head bowed to where Pete stood in the back. His footsteps on the hard floor echoed. He stood beside Pete without looking at him.
    â€œI don’t have anything against you,” said Pete, “as long as you leave Neb alone.”
    Brother Louis kept his head bowed.