Drop Dead Demons Read Online Free

sprayed an impressive amount of lava snot.
    I wasn’t nearly as thrilled to see it as it was to see me.
    The zip-tie broke with a sharp snap . My hands flew apart. Freedom.
    Blood oozed from small scrapes on my wrists. I ran out and grabbed the crowbar, then staggered away from the snowplow, hoping to keep its attention off Matthias. The demon huffed a few times, shook its head with fury. Crusty bits of black rock flew off. It closed its eyes and leaned back to pound its chest again, grunting and snorting and generally going all jungle-fever, making a big show of force and giving every impression it was about to attack.
    So consumed with his big, bad display of gorilla power it didn’t see me reel back my pitching arm, and hurl the crowbar, spiraling the rod of metal through the air. Just like a spear.
    Hey, two could play the jungle-fever game.
    I’d shown a natural propensity for throwing sharp objects and this time was no exception. The crowbar rocketed through space and buried dead-nuts into the center of the demon’s belly. As if popping an enormous zit, liquid spurted and boiling magma poured from the wound.
    Nice.
    I nodded and gave myself a mental pat on the back, wishing there was someone around to appreciate my greatness and—
    Aw, crap.
    In seconds, the metal crowbar simply turned red hot, curled around itself, and melted, disappearing into the glowing guts of the gorilla, becoming a harmless part of the churning hot mass. A layer of hardened rock shored up any sign of the wound. The demon wasn’t so much injured as just royally ticked off.
    He raked a hand up his belly, gathering up a clump of himself, and threw what took me way too long to realize was a sizzling fireball of molten lava.
    Headed right for my chest.
    I spun backwards and leapt into the bed of the navy blue pickup truck behind me. A violent shudder rocked the vehicle as the lava ball hit the side. A thundering boom followed. The truck jumped then listed to one side, as hot lava melted and popped one of its tires. 
    I stayed low until Flaming Kong belted out a repeat of his blow-drying battle cry and flung another orb of lava. Illuminated against the backdrop of the night sky, it sailed a smooth arc directly at my hiding place. I shoved aside a bag of aluminum cans and latched a solid grip onto the handle of a snow shovel. I stood and swung, putting my whole back into it.  
    I’m sure it would’ve been a homerun, but hard to prove because instead of hitting it out of the park, the lava ball splattered into fiery orange bits, the intense heat warping the shovel’s metal blade.
    The demon kept throwing fast balls, and I kept swacking them until the shovel curled and warped into something resembling a twisted piece of abstract modern art.
    And became utterly useless.
    I leapt from the truck, scrambled across the tops of two sedans, slipped on their polished surfaces wet from the mist, fell, scrambled to my feet, leapt onto an SUV, stumbled to my knees, slid over its hood. When another lava ball whistled behind me, I lurched up, grabbed the hook hanging off the tow truck’s tow bar, and swung Tarzan style — seemed appropriate — over a VW bug, and when I was clear, let go, and sailed through the air.
    I thumped to the ground in a blurring spin. Which stopped when I tumbled into a high-gloss orange Harley Davidson motorcycle. Which crashed it into the Harley next to it. Which crashed into the next, and the next and…you get the idea. A colorful array of matching helmets also toppled into the clattering mess.
    The Aurora Lahey Disaster Domino Affect brought down seven motorcycles in all. Maybe eight.
    Great, I’d have hell’s demons and Hell’s Angels gunning for me now.
    The molten monkey bounded from above, landed in front of me, and took a swing with his big hulking, lava infused arm.
    I dropped low and dove under a fallen Harley. Metal screeched and sparks flew as the demon tossed aside the motorcycle like it was an annoying