future together, and now you’ve changed your mind? We
made this plan together. I didn’t think we were influencing each
other, I thought we were agreeing with each other on what we
wanted. We were even going to talk to our parents about when we
could work in trips to see each other during the school year. It’s
one year, then we’ll be at the same college. That’s what we
planned.” Where’s this coming from? What’s
she not telling me?
“ GC, all those late night calls planning our
future aren’t realistic. We got caught up in the idea. Things
change. I don’t know if Coastal is the place for me anymore, and I
don’t want you to base your decision for college and basketball on
me. Just know you’ll always have a special place in my
heart.”
As I begin to speak, my heart begins to shatter
knowing she’s pulling away from me. “I don’t really know what to
say. We had a plan for our future. I was supposed to play ball
while you studied marine life. You were supposed to be sitting
courtside for all my games cheering me on. Please don’t walk out of
my life. You mean too much to me.”
“ That’s exactly why I’m letting you go. Bye,
GC.” Then the line goes quiet.
I sit there in my truck and replay the
conversation. What. The. Fuck! Anger fills me as I slam my fist into the steering wheel to
keep the tears at bay. I just don’t understand how she can let go
of us. I know it was by chance we found each other, but she can’t
deny the connection we have. Doing my best to shake it from my
brain, I put the truck in drive, stop by the post office and mail
the gift I had for her. Regardless of what she says, I want her to
know what she means to me, even if it’s over. As the package falls
into the drop box, the tears I’ve pushed away fill my eyes and I
make my way home a complete wreck.
Noticing my mom is in the kitchen, I try to
pass her quickly. Just as I make my way to the hallway, she calls
my name. Shit. I turn and
when her eyes meet mine, she drops her spatula on the counter and
walks to me.
“ Gunnison, sweetie, what happened?
“ Marleigh just broke up with me, said she’s
not even sure me and Coastal are her plan anymore. I just don’t
understand.”
“ GC, it’s going to be okay. There will be
someone else. I promise.” I shake my head on her shoulder as I cry
like a baby in my mom’s arms.
“ No it’s not, Mom. I know you and Dad thought
it was just some summer fling, but I love her. I really do. She’s
different; I think something’s going on.”
“ What do you mean?”
“ First she said she wasn’t feeling well and
now she doesn’t think Coastal is right for her and doesn’t want her
decisions to affect mine. Mom, I’ve always wanted to go to Coastal.
It won’t be the same without her but it’s always been my dream to
go.
“ That’s an honorable thing, letting you go.
You both are so young. But what do you think is wrong? Why do you
think she changed her mind?” Then my moms face flashes fear across
it. “GC there’s no chance she could be pregnant is
there?”
That thought has never crossed my mind, but surely
if she was we’d go through that together. “No! I don’t know what’s
going on, Mom. It kills me I can’t just go see her and make her
talk to me and tell me what is really going on.”
“ I know, sweetie, relationships are hard when
you are so far away. I hope she changes her mind and you can meet
up at Coastal. Maybe you just need to enjoy your senior year. Life
has a way of working things out if you don’t try to fight
it.”
“ I think that’s easy to say Mom, but harder to
do. But what choice do I have? I guess I’m going to try and move
on,” I say as I move from her, pushing the tears away and trying to
forget Marleigh Anderson. Who am I
kidding? I’m never going to forget her.
Chapter 4
Thanksgiving 2011
MARLEIGH
Walking into the house from Black Friday
shopping, I’m exhausted. Usually I’m worn out from getting up