see a woman who had bigger muscles than most of the guys in the gym. She was checking me out quite a bit between her sets on the bench press, but as you know, my boat doesn’t float that way. More power to her though,” I said. “There was also a nerdy guy wearing pink spandex and a white tank top and a backpack walking on the treadmill next to me. A lot of weirdness, but no hot guys,” I said.
“Damn,” Lexy replied. “You really do have bad luck. You know, I find it interesting that you aren’t having to fight guys away with a baseball bat. You’re a hot little piece of ass, and you’re only twenty-two. I mean, look at you with your perfect skin, cute little bob haircut, and awesome tattoos. Hell, if I was a guy I would be all over you. Shit, if I was single I would be all over you.”
I burst out laughing and smacked the bar in front of me. The sound grabbed the attention of the bartender, who shot me a flirty little smile as he served drinks to the couple across from us.
“I don’t have trouble with finding men,” I complained. “I have trouble finding the right men. I don’t know why, but I seem to only attract the boring, dull, lifeless assholes in this city. The assholes definitely flock to me.”
Just as the words spilled out of my mouth, a man wearing a white, collared shirt, suspenders, and thick bifocals came and took a seat next to me. As he sat down, he stared directly at me with a weird half-smile. I tried to nod at him and then turn around quickly, but he was too fast. Before I could turn around he began speaking to me.
“Hi there,” the nerd said. His breath wreaked of what I thought was a combination of Tequila and peanut butter.
I didn’t respond. I hoped that if I ignored him he would just go away. I was wrong.
“My name is Paxon,” the man said. I held my breath and turned around to face him as Lexy put her hand over her mouth to keep from laughing out loud.
“That’s nice,” I said, hesitant. As I tried to turn around again, Paxon continued.
“I saw you when you first came in. It took me a while to build up the nerve to come and talk to you. You’re really pretty, you know that? Do you mind if I buy you a drink?”
I looked down at my drink and frowned when I saw that it was almost empty and that I would be needing another one soon. I knew that if I let him buy me a drink he would think I was interested. I needed to steal a page from Lexy’s book if I wanted to get rid of this guy, but that wasn’t quite my style.
“Umm, no thanks,” I replied. “I’m fine, actually. But thanks for asking.”
“Are you sure? I would love to buy you another drink. What is that? A cherry martini?” Paxon wasn’t taking no for an answer.
“Umm, no, really. I really do appreciate it, but I’m fine. Just a having a drink with my girlfriend here. But I appreciate it. I’m flattered,” I lied.
Paxon shot me a crooked smile. He apparently thought that by turning him down I was sending him a signal to try harder. He had no idea how wrong he was.
Suddenly, Paxon turned to the bartender and began trying to order me a drink.
“Bartender,” he said, “get this pretty lady another cherry martini, please. On me.”
“Jesus-fucking-Christ!” Lexy blared from the other side of me. “She said she doesn’t want you to buy her a drink. You don’t even have the drink order right, Dexter! I mean, seriously, look at her. You’re obviously way out of your league here. Please crawl back to whatever laboratory you came from so me and my friend can finish our night in peace. Thanks.”
I snapped my head back around to look at Paxon. He didn’t seem the type to be able to stand up to a hot tempered, filterless woman like Lexy.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend. I … sorry,” Paxon stammered just before scooting off of his seat and slinking away.
“Holy shit, Lex, I think you made him cry. Why do you have to be so mean?” I said.
“What! You should be thanking me. I just