surreal.
“Uh yeah. It’s kind of a shock.”
But it was a good one. I’d been so afraid that I was going to lose Sophie in a permanent way that I hadn’t even entertained the possibility that she could be pregnant. Now it made sense—the fatigue, the decreased appetite, the fainting. And we’d been incredibly remiss about birth control.
“Okay, boss. Let me know if you need anything else.”
I hung up, slipped the phone back in my pocket and stared at the cartoon frogs hopping on the machine in front of me. Suddenly I felt as sober as a judge. I stood up and a fresh wave of nausea washed over me. A trip to the bathroom relieved me of my stomach contents, then I headed into the closest restaurant where I found a relatively quiet table in the back corner.
When the waitress came by I ordered a pot of coffee, a farmer’s omelet, a side of French toast, potatoes and a fruit plate.
“Worked up an appetite, I see.” She smiled.
I read her nametag. “Dee Dee, I just found out I’m going to be a father. I’ve gotta sober up and celebrate.”
Sensing a bigger tip might accompany my expansive mood, Dee Dee’s grin broadened. “Congratulations! What happy news.”
Happy and completely unexpected news. The more I thought about it, the more I concluded that Sophie already knew about this and had been keeping it from me on purpose. A twinge of anger rose in my belly when I thought about her keeping my child from me. My son. It would be a boy, I just knew it.
I had to remember I betrayed Sophie, at least in her mind. If we were going to move forward together even a step, I needed to look at this from her perspective too. At least try to understand where she could be coming from. Seeing as she was going to be the mother of my child, the least I could do was give her the benefit of the doubt.
Ever since Sophie left me, I’d tried to forget about her. Even though I’d put a Herculean effort into it, I’d never succeeded. While we’d been together I’d lied to her—catfished her really. From her perspective I had to be the most untrustworthy man in the world. I’d believed we couldn’t come back from that. I believed her when she’d said I singlehandedly destroyed what I loved most—her, and everything between us.
I’d taken an exquisitely innocent and beautiful woman, turned her into a filthy whore for my own enjoyment. Then, convinced of my penchant for destruction, I destroyed our love too. And I did it all to protect her. I should have known that no matter what I did, I would ruin it all anyway.
But now that Sophie was going to have my baby, maybe there was a chance for us after all …
5
Quentin
“ Y ou’re going to be a father?” Dr. Beckett appeared surprised at the news, but not to the extent I’d been.
I recounted for her the events that led up to my finding out this information.
“So you’re happy about this. Even though the mother withheld this information from you and presumably doesn’t want you to know.”
“She has good reason to be upset with me.”
“You said that you deceived her. Now, by not telling you about the pregnancy, she is, in turn, deceiving you.”
I thought I saw a hint of disapproval on the doc’s face. “I take responsibility for the turn things have taken between me and Sophie. What I did was rather unforgivable. I can’t blame her.”
“Why is that?”
“You have to understand that it all started because I was trying to protect her.”
“From you?”
“Yes. It may sound crazy, but after Kaitlyn tried to kill herself, I started to feel I was cursed. That bad things were going to happen to people around me.”
“Kaitlyn is your former submissive?”
“Yes. When we were involved she became too dependent on me, wanted more than I could give her so I had to break things off with her. After I did, she started stalking me—at least that’s what I called it …”
“What do you mean, stalking?”
“She found out where I lived, and I’d come