happy talk drift up the street from the Lesoles. Mr. Lesoleâs a safari guide; heâs mostly away in the bush. When heâs home, he celebrates, spending his tip money on CDs for his boom box and food for his guests. Normally I like itâI even go overâbut tonight, all I can think is: How can there be parties with Mama dead? How can the world go on without her?
I turn right toward the sandlot and hear a familiarvoice: âIf I was you, I wouldnât be wandering far, this time of night.â
Mrs. Tafaâs in her lawn chair, alone in the dark under her tree, waiting for Mr. Tafa to come home. All of a sudden, she doesnât seem so mean. Just lonely. Iâm filled with shame. Why am I mad about what she does for Soly and Iris? Why should they lose out because of my fear and pride?
I go into Mrs. Tafaâs yard and sit quietly on the ground beside her lawn chair. We donât talk about our fight. Donât talk about anything. Just sit there. After a long time I swallow hard and say: âThank you for doing Irisâs cornrows.â
âIt was nothing,â she says. âSomething to pass the time, is all.â A pause. âItâs nice to have someone braid your hair, isnât it?â Another pause. âI could do yours someday if youâd like. Not as good as your mama, mind. But I could try.â
I sob. Mrs. Tafa puts her hand on my shoulder. âItâs hard, isnât it?â
I gulp air.
âYour mama was the finest woman who walked this earth,â Mrs. Tafa says gently. âOh, how she loved you kids. She was proud of you, especially. Before she went to Tiro,she said to me, âRose, no matter what happens, I can die happy. I know my Chanda will take care of things.ââ Mrs. Tafa slaps her thighs. âBut why talk about sad things, when thereâs so much good to remember?â She leans in to my ear. âIâm thinking of when you were little, how your mamaâd blow on your tummy to stop you being grumpy.â
I sniffle-smile at the thought of it. âIâve tried that on Iris,â I say. âShe hates it.â
âIris is a special one, isnât she?â Mrs. Tafa chuckles, and recalls the time Mama was shelling peas and Iris got one stuck up her nose: âYour mama made her a necklace of husks so sheâd stop crying.â Soon, Mrs. Tafa and I are laughing and storytelling in the dark. Stories about Mama. Happy stories. Simple stories. Stories from our time in the worker houses at the mine, to a few years back when Mama won a prize at the street fair for her sweet-potato pie.
âYou should have seen the way your mama and papa flirted at the mine hall,â Mrs. Tafa winks. âThe glint in your mamaâs eye when your papaâd do a jig. Folks knew they took care of business, all right.â
I get all embarrassed, but I want to hear more. As long as we talk, Mamaâs alive. Please, I donât want to go to bed ever. When Mr. Tafa finally comes home, though, I know itâs time.
âItâs been ages since weâve talked like this,â Mrs. Tafa says. âLetâs do it again.â She watches from her stoop as I head to my door. At the last minute, I have a sudden need to run back. I fall on my knees and clutch her round the waist. âAuntie Rose, will the pain ever go away?â
Mrs. Tafa kneels down, arms around me. âRemember how it was with your papa?â
I nod.
She kisses the top of my head. âThe missing never goes away,â she says. âBut after a time, the hurtingâs not so sharp. And in the end, if youâre lucky, thereâs a glow.â
An enormous hole opens in the pit of my stomach. âWhy did Mama have to die? Why like that? I wish sheâd never gone back to Tiro.â
Oh, how Mama hated Tiro. At fifteen, Granny and Grampa engaged her to Tuelo Malunga, a boy from the neighboring cattle post; but Mama was