Catchee Monkey: A Rex & Eddie Mystery (Rex & Eddie Mysteries Book 1) Read Online Free Page A

“What about seven-fifty?”
    “Sold.”
    “Rex, what are you doing?”
    “Haggling?”
    “Up?”
    “Oh, right, sorry about that.”
    Eddie rolled his eyes. “I’ll get the seven-hundred.”
    “Sorry, mate. But this fella’s giving me seven hundred and fifty.”
    “What? No he’s not,” Eddie said. “Tell him you’re not.”
    “I’m not.”
    Tim thumped Rex in the shoulder. “You gotta stand up for yourself mate, don’t back down like that. He’s trying to steal the car from right under yah.”
    Misinterpreting the playful push as physical violence, Rex didn’t know what to do. “Yeah, OK. Seven-fifty it is.”
    “That’s more like it.”
    “Fine,” Eddie snapped, knowing he was on the losing end of an idiotic argument. “Seven-fifty.” He counted the money and passed it to Tim.
    “Nah mate, you can’t offer the same as the competition’s bid, he still gets it.”
    “We are not separate buyers. Rex and I are together.”
    “Together aye?” Tim turned to Rex “This true? Are you and him, together?”
    Rex’s body froze, only his eyes shifted. Violence always sent him inward. In a panic he’d forgotten about the car and thought this was a mugging.
    “Oi? Don’t ignore me. It’s disrespectful. Are you two together?”
    Rex turned to Eddie and back at Tim.  
    “No.”
    Eddie raised his hands. “What are you saying?” Rex thought he was being asked if they were a couple. Tim’s push followed by his irritated tone made Rex think he was about to become the victim of a misidentified hate-crime.
    “Look mate, if you want it, you’re gonna have to offer more than my man here.”
    Eddie sneered. “Fine, seven hundred and fifty-one.”
    “It’s in increments of fifty.”
    “Oh right, so you don’t know what inconspicuous means but you know the word increment?”  
    Tim’s beady eyes stared Eddie down.  
    “Fine, eight hundred.” Eddie pulled out the extra fifty and made the exchange.
    Rex and Eddie got in the car. Eddie was the driver since Rex had never taken driving lessons. Tim knocked on the driver’s window. Eddie turned the hand crank to lower the glass.
    “I just want to say, I know you gay boys get a hard time, but I wish you a lifetime of happiness.”
    Eddie forced a smile. “Thanks, but we’re business partners.” Tim cocked his head in confusion. “Tell him Rex.”
    Rex sat in his seat, hands on his thighs, head hung low. He still hadn’t gotten over his fright.
    “All right mate, I get yah.” Tim gave a wink and patted the car as he left.
    ***
    Eddie insisted they repaint the office’s grubby walls. The clean new carpet highlighted the wall's marks, stains and general nastiness. They laid newspaper down close to the walls and applied primer.
    “Rex, will you open the window?” Eddie asked. “The paint fumes have gone to my head.”
    Rex worked his way over to the window and gave it a yank. It didn’t budge. He felt cheated and pulled harder.
    “Push it up.”
    “I did push it up. It’s jammed.”
    Eddie joined him and they both tugged at the same time. The window would not move.
    “It’s useless,” Rex said.
    “Try harder.”
    Rex gave the handle a massive pull, and it snapped off. He stumbled backwards and tripped as he knocked over the paint can, which dumped the paint onto the carpet.
    “No, no, no,” Eddie yelled as he jumped over Rex and grabbed the can. It was already half empty. The thick white primer consumed the carpet as it stretched out. Eddie tried to push it back in the can.
    “I’m fine thanks,” Rex grumbled as he pulled himself back up.
    “Do you know what this means?”
    “We’ve lost our deposit?”
    “My deposit. And they can kick us out. Which means they’d keep all six months of the rent.”
    “It’s not too bad. We just need a bit of paint thinner.”
    “And have a four-foot wide stain?”
    “OK, so if we paint the whole floor then use the paint thinner, it will all match.”
    “We have to take up the carpet and