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right man will understand the pain you’ve gone through and will be patient with you.” She kisses the top of my head, just as a mother would do. Even though she’s a wild one, she’s one of the sweetest and down to earth friends I have.
    “You’re right. Thank you for that.” After a minute, I add, “You cannot find me a guy on that site. I’ll find my own the old fashioned way.” With how many men she swiped left, the dating pool seems to be increasingly smaller than when I was in college. All the good guys are married by now and there has to be something seriously wrong with the ones left.
    “Whatever you say. I got you, girl.”
    We spend the rest of the day reminiscing about bad dates from our past, but before long, we start comparing each of them to Liam and how incredible he was. Letting it all out and talking about him freely feels good.
    “He was one of the good ones. We all knew it,” Shannon replies as she grabs her jacket. Fall is finally here and even though it’s Texas, Austin can still get chilly at night.
    “Yeah, that’s what makes moving on so hard. Thank you for tonight, though. I think you’ve brought me one step closer to making my first leap.”
    “You’re weird. Go to bed.” She laughs as she leaves.
    As I walk through my apartment, I pass four photos of Liam and me. Each are memories I hold dear to my heart, and as I head to my room, I say aloud, “Please, please give me a sign that you’re okay with me eventually moving on. I love you and always will. Night, babe.”
    I might be crazy, but I can feel Liam watching over me. If I stop believing in that, I fear I’ll lose him for good. For now, it brings me peace to think about him watching over me and guiding me in the right direction.
    As I slip into bed, I pray I don’t have any more nightmares. I concentrate on my breathing and on the soft material covering me. I’m safe when I’m awake, but my mind messes with me as soon as I close my eyes. They’ve been coming most nights over the past few months, and they are never the same. Occasionally, I’ll have a beautiful dream of the times Liam and I spent together but others are far darker. Not knowing what I’m closing my eyes to, though, is like Russian roulette.
    I toss and turn, never finding a comfortable position. Finally, I settle on my side with my body pillow behind me. Having that warmth against my back reminds me of Liam and all our nights spent together. My breathing calms as I give in to sleep, and my last fleeting thought is that I hope I make it through the night without another nightmare.
     
    Slipping his arms around my waist, Liam slides in behind me as I apply my eye shadow. His firm hands spread out over my stomach as he whispers into my ear, “One day, Tinsley, you’re going to be carrying my child. A child blessed with your button nose and tender heart, and my height and eyes. It’ll be from our love, and he or she will be surrounded by good grace and full hearts. One day.” He places soft kisses on my neck as I close my makeup and turn to face him.
    “You sure are being sweet about it. You really want to start a family, don’t you?” I look into his eyes and fall in love all over again.
    “More than anything in the world. As long as it’s with you.”
    “How am I supposed to go to work now when all I can think about is making babies with you? You know I’m going to be completely unproductive today. I blame you,” I say with a smile.
    We’ve always been safe. I’ve been on birth control since high school and condoms were part of our routine. We had never questioned it before, but now, thinking about him bare inside me? Fuck if it didn’t turn me on.
    “You’re wet for me, aren’t you?” he asks, and I nod as I bite my lip. “Do you think your boss will mind if you’re a little late?” We both laugh, knowing I don’t have anyone to answer to since I am the boss. Liam takes my arm and leads me into the bedroom. I hop on the bed as he