noticed everything about her. All the time.
"Garrett, what the hell are you asking me?" He sat heavily on the bench.
"You know damn well what I'm asking you. I just invited you into bed with us."
A low sound rumbled in his throat, almost like a trapped animal. "Jesus, Garrett." Head low, jaw clenched, he sighed and fidgeted with his SCBA. "Look. I admire how much she loves you, and she's funny as hell. Kind of like the girl next door with a dark side, and it's hot. Christ, what am I saying?" He rubbed his face with his hand and turned to Garrett. "Why?"
"Why not? You're my best friend; I trust you. Can you imagine how incredible it would be, us both with her?"
The blood rushed out of his face. The three of them together—clear as day he saw the image in his head. Carrie, with her classic auburn haired beauty, was not a new vision. The two of them bracketing her, naked and exploring her beautiful, creamy skin together without reservation, that was new and burned into his head like a brand. He wanted it so much it made him shake.
"No way. I'm not even going to start on the fact you just offered me your wife like I'm some desperate lonely son of a bitch, but, have you really thought this through, Garrett? I mean really? What if I fucked her, and she liked it, and we run off and leave you behind? What the hell are you thinking?" His voice had risen to the point a couple of the guys on the other side of the room looked over.
Garrett shook his head. "You wouldn't, and Carrie would never leave me—not even for you. I'm not worried about that part of it at all. I don't know . . . the whole thing seemed to click in my head. I could see the two of you together, and I . . . it made me . . . ah, hell. The first time I thought about it, I fucked her so hard she was shocked. I'm not an idiot, John."
John shook his head slowly back and forth, dazed. "I don't know. I'm not a casual sex kind of guy."
"Exactly why I'm asking. I know you aren't, and you haven't had a girlfriend in months."
"Yeah, exactly. I can't really have a sex thing going on with you guys and have a life, you know?" John stood, his head swiveling hard now. "This is insane, Garrett."
"Okay, okay. I know I sound insane. I sound like a fucking idiot, and I feel like a total freak asshole even saying it, but I'm at the point if I don't get it out I'm going to fucking scream. I want to see you with her, what she's like with you."
"Your wife isn't a bitch in heat! You can't have a guy jump in to service her." His anger was rising to the surface, but for none of the reasons he voiced to Garrett. He balked because his deepest desire had been offered and there was no way he could reach out and take it. No way.
Garrett's face turned dark, and John flinched at the look of sheer regret and shame he saw. "No, dumb ass, that's not it, not at all. Fine, I'm a fucking idiot. I have no idea what I was thinking. I'm a total dickhead for suggesting it, and you should kick my ass." He stood to leave, his body tight and angry.
"Wait! Okay . . . shit, sit down."
He turned away and composed himself a little, guilt riddling him for making Garrett feel like shit when he was lying through his teeth. Plus, the temptation to hang on to the conversation, the idea, overpowered him. Spend a few more moments daydreaming about the possibility, maybe, no matter how farfetched. "Look, you gotta see how much of a shock this is."
"Is it because you can't look at her that way, or you don't want to be involved with us?"
His best friend and the love of his life? Was he fucking kidding?
"All right, truth. First off, hell yeah I could want her. She's about damn near perfect, but that's what scares me. I can see where you'd consider it, but man, you're looking at this from the point of view of a guy who's already got the world by the balls, you know? I don't have the same perspective."
"You've got nothing to lose, then."
"No, I've got everything to lose, because if I get attached and this is a disaster, when it's