Bridesmaids Read Online Free Page B

boyfriend?’ I ask. ‘Did I torture kittens in a past life or something?’
    Charlotte tries to stop herself from smiling. ‘She’s not that bad,’ she says. ‘I think she might be insecure.’
    We both look over in Valentina’s direction.
    ‘Kelly Brook?’ she’s saying loudly to one of the ushers. ‘Oh, that’s funny, because most people tell me I look like Angelina Jolie…’
    ‘I know she’s not that bad,’ I say, ‘but insecure? She couldn’t be more secure if she were padlocked and guarded by MI5.’
    Charlotte giggles.
    ‘Anyway, let’s see who’s on your table. Oh, lucky you!’ I say, nudging her.
    Charlotte has been put next to Jim, Grace’s favourite cousin. He’s a trainee cameraman with the BBC, who has been roped into doing the wedding video today. Although he’s a year or two younger than us, he is one of the nicest people you could ever hope to meet. Secretly, I have always thought he would make a perfect partner for Charlotte.
    ‘Jim’s lovely, you know,’ I tell her, not very subtly.
    Charlotte blushes and looks away. She does this all the time–often for little apparent reason–and I know that she despairs of this trait, as with one rush of blood to the head, her entire thoughts are laid out for the world to see. In this case, if I know Charlotte, I can see very plainly that she’s got a crush.
    ‘What’s up?’ I say softly. ‘You have been introduced to Jim, haven’t you?’
    ‘Er, yes,’ she replies. ‘I’ve met him once or twice before.’
    ‘Don’t you think he’s nice?’ I add.
    ‘Hmm,’ she says, her cheeks now the colour of a particularly full-bodied Valpolicella.
    ‘You could do worse, you know,’ I tell her.
    ‘I don’t know what you mean,’ she says, fiddling with the strings on her satin bag.
    ‘Charlotte, you don’t have to hide these things from me,’ I say, holding her hand. But she still looks like a teenager during a parental chat about contraceptive methods.
    ‘I’ll drop a few hints if you like,’ I offer when she doesn’t reply.
    ‘No!’ she says immediately. ‘Please, Evie, no .’
    ‘Okay, okay,’ I say, deciding it’s time to back off. For now. I know only too well that if Charlotte gets herself too worked up, she’ll go out of her way to avoid ever speaking to Jim again. The poor girl definitely needs my intervention somewhere along the way, I don’t doubt that. Charlotte has only ever had one boyfriend–Gordon, a damp-proofing specialist–who was uniquely lacking in a single interesting feature. His one talent was that he could tell you everything you never wanted to know about the differences between dry and wetrot, which, believe me, are many and varied. That was years ago, however, and Charlotte is more than overdue another romantic liaison.
    Before we sit down to eat, I go to powder my nose and triple check for stray boob enhancers, cabbage in my front teeth, and that I haven’t accidentally tucked my skirt into my knickers. Then I take a deep breath and head back to the marquee to locate table five. Jack is already there by himself. I contemplate making a diversion so I’m not left talking to him alone, but he sees me and raises his eyebrows casually in recognition.
    Oh no–help me, someone. I’m stuck with Valentina’s eye candy already.

Chapter 12
    ‘It’s the bridesmaid with the big voice,’ says Jack cheerfully as I approach our table.
    I should be relieved that he’s chosen that, and not the earlier incident, to remind me of, but I still can’t help sounding slightly irritated.
    ‘Am I not going to be allowed to forget that?’ I ask.
    ‘I won’t mention it again, I promise,’ he grins. ‘So, how do you know the bride?’
    I’ve chit-chatted with enough of Valentina’s beaux over the years to know that the next couple of hours are likely to be as excruciating as a dodgy Brazilian wax. But I tell myself to be polite. I don’t suppose it’s his fault if he’s as bright as a 5-watt pygmy