understand.'
'True,' I said.
'Excuse, excuse,' he said, with that dry laugh again. 'I hear this man speaking Icelandic so I ask him if he also speaks Esperanto. And, another miracle, he does. A little, most certainly. Here.'
He gave me his card which made him a German called Bottger who was something big in Esperanto. By this time the brennivin had arrived and Christopher had got a third for
Bottger.
'Do you know,' Christopher said, rotating between the two of us, 'that the recipe for this stuff is still kept secret?'
'Thank God,' I said, as the first sip turned my face into a prune. 'Don't let it out, that's all.'
'I say, don't you like it?' he asked, sounding very concerned.
'Well, if you were an alcoholic it wouldn't stop you drinking, but it would certainly take the pleasure out of it.'
That brought us nicely up to that what-brings-you-here stuff. I told Christopher about my new employer (Grimm, not Batty, of course) and the Sexy Eskies, and he put his hand on my arm and said: 'Look at it this way- someone's got to do it.'
That made me feel like a hangman. Or an undertaker perhaps. Either way, it wasn't good..
Bottger, a solo twin, was planning on striding about the scenery in large boots, visiting old Esperanto friends, so they could talk about the rest of us behind our backs. That brought up another volley of the stuff, which Christopher translated.
'He says that if only people would take the trouble to learn Esperanto, we could all speak what is in our hearts.'
'That would mean war.'
'No, no,' Bottger chipped in, in impatient English. 'That is the point. No more wars, no misunderstandings, no troubles. We see into each other's minds.'
. 'If that stewardess gets to see into my mind,' I said, 'there'll be plenty of troubles, I can tell you. And how about you?' I asked Christopher. 'You're an international lavatory-paper smuggler, I take it?'
He wasn't. But only just. He'd tried a few things. Farming, publishing, salesman. He hadn't hit quite the right thing so far. He'd heard a tourist boom was coming in Iceland and he'd come north, fallen in love with the country and learned the language. So he was setting up an import-export business, with the musical paper-holder as his first move.
'People absolutely love them. They go like hot cakes at all the seaside places, I'm told.'
'And what are you sending back the other way?' Whatever it was, I thought it had to be better than those. Not necessarily, as it turned out. He planned to ship back shoals of stuffed puffins to an unsuspecting Britain.
I'd seen them in the shops there. Depressed-looking creatures, poised awkwardly on a chunk of lava. I didn't say so, but frankly I wouldn't have wanted to put all my money into stuffed puffins.
'But this,' he said, tapping the plastic bag, 'is my second million. Any chance of a free plug in that paper of yours?'
'Not unless you can persuade a female puffin to take all her feathers off.'
6
That's the time to arrive in Iceland - bang in the middle of a summer night.
Then the sun doesn't sett. It just slips off-stage for an hour or two. I gave the other two a lift into town in a Daihatsu jeep I'd hired, and we sat in silence as the narrow strip of tarmac led over the cold grey lava fields, set like forgotten porridge or boiled-over toffee. The first American astronauts practised there: they say they found the moon quite homely after that.
Soon we saw the red and green roofs of Reykjavik and I dropped them in the town and set off for Thingvellir. If she wanted to see me, that's where she'd be.
Out over the lava field I went. A cold blade of a wind fleeced a