Between a Wok and a Hard Place Read Online Free Page B

some damned Pulitzer."
    I winced at his language. One more time, and I'd have to chide him.
    "I'm sure it is. Who nominated you?"
    He squirmed again. "The nominations are confidential, but I can tell you, it was one of the most thrilling moments of
    my life. Almost as thrilling as that time in Africa when I assisted Dr. Schweitzer in surgery. He was my mentor, of course,
    although some say that Al should have shared the prize with me that year."
    "You don't say."
    Even if Dr. Brack shared Cher's plastic surgeon, it was doubtful he was more than sixty. Since Dr. Schweitzer won
    the Nobel prize in 1952, that would have made Dr. Brack fourteen at the time.
    "But enough about me," he said with a cap-revealing smile, "I want to talk about you."
    "Me?"
    "You have the worst posture I have ever seen in an adult woman not afflicted with scoliosis."
    It was a good thing the windows all had screens, or I might have caught a mouthful of flies.
    "You were aware of that, weren't you?" he asked, just as casually as could be.
    I found my jaw muscles. "Well, I never! That was the rudest thing anyone has ever said to me."
    "Oh, but I meant it in the nicest way. With your back and my brace, we could make millions."
    I stood up, as straight as a flagpole. "I don't think so."
    “But I found a factory in Honduras that will make the brace for pennies per piece."
    I walked away.
    "You'd make the perfect poster girl," he called after me. "We could show a before shot without the brace. . ."
     
    4
    I was not in a good mood when I answered the phone. “PennDutch Inn!"
    "Magdalena, this is Melvin - "
    "My nemesis?"
    "You pantsed me in seventh grade. You started it."
    It was true. I had tugged on Melvin's overalls, but only because they were unsnapped. He was asking for it. Had
    Melvin been the decent guy he claims to be, he would have done me a favor and not worn underwear that day, in which
    case, I would still be a single woman.
    "What is it, dear?" I asked patiently. "Is your cast itching you again." With uncharacteristic maturity, he ignored my
    jibe. "The preliminary coroner's report is in. Of course it's a little complicated - the language and all - and I wouldn't
    expect you to understand everything - "
    "Read it to me, Melvin."
    It wasn't complicated at all. Anyone with as much English as a New York cab driver could understand the report. It
    was distressing, however. The body, as yet unidentified, showed a bruise that corresponded to a horse's hoofprint, and
    another linear bruise an inch and a quarter wide. The latter was possibly two bruises, one superimposed and slightly
    overlapping the other.
    "Sounds like our mystery lady was run over by an Amish buggy,” I said midway through the report.
    Melvin snickered. “The first rule in police work is not to jump to conclusions, Magdalena. There are other
    possibilities.”
    “It wasn't Santa and his reindeer,” I snapped.
    “There was one linear bruise, Magdalena, not two.
    Hernia area buggies have two sets of wheels.”
    “Yes, but the wheels are at least four feet apart. Clearly, the buggy ran over her with just one set of wheels.”
    “Will you let me finish, Yoder? There is a lot more.”
    I let him finish. There was indeed a lot more. Before being run over by the buggy, our mystery woman had been
    strangled.
    “By what?” I asked.
    “It doesn't say. This is just a preliminary report, remember?”
    “Well, I can tell you right now, it may have been an Amish buggy that ran over her, but it wasn't an Amish person who
    strangled her."
    The static I heard next was Melvin bristling, I'm sure. “What makes you an expert so suddenly?”
    It was time to backpedal a little. As much as I disliked dealing with Melvin, helping him with the case would be
    preferable to having my ear bent by Wilmar “Bragging" Brack.
    “Of course I know nothing about police work, dear, but I do know something about the Amish. It just doesn't fit.”
    “Yeah? Well, there have been documented cases of Amish