Bad Taste in Boys Read Online Free

busy!”
    I sighed again. “Jonah, can you hand me that clipboard?”
    It took him three tries to pick it up due to his hand impediment. I grabbed the papers off the clipboard and shoved them under the door. They contained personal medical information, which couldn’t be left in the open.
    “Screw it,” I said, looking over the remaining supplies on the cart. “If someone wants the Gatorade that badly, they can have it. Let’s go.”
    Jonah squealed, jumping up and down and shaking his pom-poms. His skirt swished around his scrawny yellow knees.
    “Jonah, can I give you a piece of sisterly advice?”
    “Yeah.”
    “If you ever want to lose your virginity, don’t do that again. Ever.”
    He dropped the pom-poms. It wasn’t much of an improvement.
    When we tried to pull into Kiki’s driveway about an hour later, it was so jammed with cars that I had to park on the grass. Jonah bounced incessantly on the seat beside me. I already had a headache.
    “We’re not staying long,” I warned him.
    “You say that now, but maybe you’ll have such an awesome time you won’t want to leave,” he said.
    I snorted. “Yeah, that’ll happen.”
    But I did need to be appropriately social. Aaron would be here, expecting more of my quick wit. All I had to do was be myself, minus the overly intellectual jokes and random spouts of medical trivia.
    I felt sick. But if I didn’t show, both Kiki and Rocky would be upset. I had to go.
    As I reached for the door handle, Mike Luzier vaulted out of the bushes, slammed against the side of my car … and vomited profusely all over the hood. The mess splattered with a disgusting wet noise, spraying all the way across the car and dripping off the other side. The vomit was black and viscous, and I could smell it from inside the car with the door closed. It smelled like toasted crap.
    “Nasty!” Jonah squealed.
    “You’re cleaning that up,” I said, without missing a beat.
    “No way.”
    “Clean it up or I’ll have to go home right now and do it myself. And I’ll take you with me. No Kiki stalking for you.”
    “Come on! That’s totally unfair.”
    “You promised to do all my chores if I brought you with me,” I said. “Your first chore is to clean off the car.”
    I tossed a box of antibacterial wipes into his lap and got out before he could object. Mike was standing next to the hood, wiping his chin. He looked much less dazed than one would expect, given the gymnastic regurgitory display he’d just put on. I wondered what god-awful substance he’d been drinking and why he wasn’t flat on his back.
    He mistook my scientific observation for something else. “Couldn’t wait for a repeat, huh?” he said, leering and breathing puke fumes right in my face. Then he looked around to make sure no one was watching and grabbed my butt.
    I was about to verbally ream him, but then Rocky and Kiki came down the driveway toward us. Mike immediately released me and backed away into the shadows. Apparently I was good enough to grope, just not in public. He disappeared so fast that I almost thought I’d hallucinated the entire thing.
    Then the breeze blew the smell of vomit past my nose.
    What a tool.
    I turned and pasted a smile on my face. “Hey, Rock. Kiki.”
    Midhug, Rocky looked over my shoulder at the lovely mess on my hood. “Oh my god, are you okay?”
    I waved my hand dismissively. “Mike Luzier. It was a puke-and-run.”
    Kiki snorted, covering her mouth. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be laughing.”
    “I don’t mind. I’m not the one who has to clean it up,” I said.
    Jonah had wrapped his hand in wipes and was dabbing ineffectually at the hood. He must have been able to sense Kiki’s eyes on him; he turned so red you could see it from fifty feet away.
    “I’d let you wash your car, but some idiot stole our hose. I can get some old towels for you, though.” Kiki started back toward the house. “And I’ll bring you a drink,” she called over her