Always Me Read Online Free Page A

“What the hell was that?” Brett gasped.
    I shook my head, my mind reeling. “I…I’m not sure.”
    He rose and ran a hand through his hair. His shoulders were stiff. I’d never seen him mad before.
    I realized that I was grateful. I wasn’t ready, and I didn’t know if I would ever be. Brett deserved better. “Brett.”
    He looked down at me, his eyes filling with wanting and something else…love? Oh God, please don’t love me. It would make everything more difficult.
    My cheeks heated and I cleared my throat. “I don’t...I think...”
    I felt the swing move, and I turned back to Brett as he lowered to his knees in front of me. His eyes blazed, taking me in.
    I swallowed, licking my dry lips. “I’m not ready, Brett.”
    He sighed and placed his hands in mind but he didn’t respond.
    “I’m sorry. As much as I want...I need...I can’t. It’s too soon.” I braced myself for his reaction.
    His gaze snapped to mine. “It’s been two years, Tori.”
    “Yeah, I know that, but I can’t get over Sebastian that quickly. I still love him,” I huffed, pushing his hands off of me.
    His jaw tensed and he grabbed my hands. “I’m sorry. That was shitty of me.”
    I kissed his forehead, cupping his cheek. “No, I’m sorry. You have every right to be frustrated. You’ve been so patient with me, and Antonio loves you. I just...I can’t do this yet.”
    He leaned against my hand, closing his eyes.
    I wanted to fall in love with him. He was such a good man, but I couldn’t. If it ever got to the point of having sex with him, it would be just that...sex. I could never love him like I loved Sebastian. The man was no longer alive, and he still had control over me. He definitely ruined me for other men. I almost laughed, knowing that he would so enjoy that, but then tears welled in my eyes. “God, I miss him, Brett. I am so sorry.”
    He kissed my palm. “I know, baby girl. I wish I could take away your pain.”
    I smiled. “Just you being here helps.”
    He placed a gentle kiss on my forehead and rose from his knees, holding out his hand.
    I took it, letting him help me up, and we walked slowly back into the house.
    I turned to the yard one last time and squinted, trying to make out anything that seemed out of place. Nothing moved, but the feeling of being watched still rained over me.
     
    ***
     
    I’ll find you, cochina.
    You can’t get rid of me that easily.
    I’ll haunt your nightmares, puta.
    You’re mine and you’ll always be mine.
    I startled awake, my sweat-soaked shirt stuck to my skin. Images from my nightmare pounded in my head as my heart beat. The note. Oh God, the note. Jose...his black evil eyes burned into my brain and probably would be there for the rest of my life. A sob escaped my lips, tears rolling down my cheeks.
    A cry sounded from the baby monitor. Antonio. I wiped the tears from under my eyes and took a deep breath. I had to be strong. For him. For us.
    I rose from the bed, grabbed my bathrobe, and headed down the hall. I opened the door and stopped. Brett was holding Antonio, cradling him against his chest. My heart swelled at the sight. Brett looked up and blushed when he caught me staring at him. “I’m sorry. I heard him crying,” he murmured.
    Taking a step toward them, I smiled. “Thank you.”
    He handed Antonio to me and placed his hands in his pockets. “You look like hell.”
    I felt like hell, too. I laughed lightly but shrugged, trying to come off that it was no big deal. “I had a nightmare.”
    “About Jose?”
    I sighed. “Yeah.”
    He kissed me on the forehead, letting his lips linger. Tears pricked behind my eyes. Why couldn’t I feel for him what he felt for me? He lifted his head and smiled down at me. We walked out of Antonio’s room and headed down the stairs in silence.
    “No, we are so not having spinach in our eggs,” Garrith complained.
    “What’s wrong with spinach?” Keisha tossed back at him.
    We walked into the open space, through the