A Fate Worse Than Death Read Online Free Page B

nodded.
    “I present to you the most valuable payment anyone could ever receive. An opportunity to restore your life. To right all your wrongs and fix all your mistakes. What I offer is a second chance. What do you say to that, Mr Clarenden?” He lit up another cigarette.
    I mulled over God’s offer. This job was clearly not going to be a walk in the park. Even the sorts of parks I was used to walking in—with rusted-out playgrounds, weed-choked lawns, and sinister figures lurking in the shadows—seemed bright and pleasant when compared to the impenetrable shadows that God Himself couldn’t see through. And yet, the idea of a second chance was pretty alluring. After the mess I’d made of my first attempt at life, the prospect of going back to have another shot was like sweet music to my previously tone-deaf ears.
    It didn’t take long for me to convince myself that the positives outweighed the negatives. Sure, I might be taking on forces beyond imagining, but it seemed worth it for a chance to fix all of my mistakes. And it only seemed fair, given I had made an awful lot of mistakes.
    “I say I am at your service. The sooner I can get started, the better.”
    “That’s what I like to hear. But remember, with payment comes responsibility. As I mentioned before, Heaven is a place of peace. I’ve worked long and hard to make it that way. If I find you are causing trouble and interfering with that peace, you will not only lose that second chance, but you will be off the case, permanently. Do I make myself clear?”
    “As clear as the water at a beach after a shark has been spotted.”
    “Splendid,” said God. He pulled on a chain that hung beside the couch. Immediately, the door opened and the tall servant reappeared. He stood by the door with a pained expression on his face, gently waving his hand in front of his nose—trying to repel the cigarette smoke while not drawing attention to the fact he was doing it.
    “I have organised the rental of a small office for you,” said God. “Gabriel here will show you where it is. He will also assist you in any way possible. If there is anything you need, he’s the man to ask.”
    I pointed to the servant, Gabriel, and put a finger to my lips.
    “No, it’s all right,” said God. “Gabriel is to be trusted. He knows about Phil’s disappearance. But he’s the only one. Remember, no one else is to know the true nature of your presence in Heaven. No one.”
    “No one will know,” I assured God.
    “Good. Now go. Search Heaven for me. Find my son and bring him back to me.” And with that, God turned away and picked up His remote control again.
    “If you would be so kind as to follow me,” said Gabriel, sounding even less interested in me than he had been at our prior meeting.
    I made to follow him out the door, but a flaring pain in the vicinity of my chest reminded me of the rather violent way I’d been forced to depart the land of the living.
    “Before I go, can I ask one more question?” I said with a grimace.
    “Anything,” said God.
    “I’ve just been shot. Is there a doctor around here I can see?”
    “I’m sorry, I quite forgot. Gabriel, please take Mr Clarenden to see my personal physician immediately.”
    As I left God’s chamber, the sound of coughing tempted me to take one quick look back. Through the smoky haze that filled the room, I could just make out the figure of God lighting another cigarette and then raising the remote control and pointing it at the television.

Chapter 3
    GABRIEL LED ME UP A FLIGHT OF STAIRS and down a short corridor. He opened a door at the end of the hall and I followed him through. We were in a small surgery. A little man with thinning brown hair and large glasses sat writing at a desk. He looked up with an enquiring expression as we entered.
    “Dr Galapagos, I have an important patient for you to see,” said Gabriel.
    “Important, is he?” said the doctor. He put down his pen and stood up. “If you’d be so