4 Waxing & Waning Read Online Free

know,” Paris said. “He’s just so … easy.”
    I raised my eyebrows in question.
    “You know, he’s always so agreeable,” Paris said. “I don’t want to fight all of the time, but I don’t want someone who just agrees with everything I want to do either.”
    “I want a guy who will do exactly what I tell him to do,” Kelsey said. “I like to boss people around.”
    “I hadn’t noticed,” I deadpanned, causing Paris to giggle.
    Kelsey pursed her lips. “Hey, I’m just being honest.”
    “Honesty is a good thing,” I said. “Trust me.”
    “What about that guy who showed up last night?” Kelsey asked. “Do you trust him?”
    “Rafael? Yeah.”
    “He didn’t seem very friendly,” Kelsey said.
    “He’s something of a loner.”
    “And where did you meet him?”
    “At a party freshman year,” I said.
    “He’s hot.”
    “He is.”
    “Then why don’t you seem more interested in him?” Kelsey asked, her eyes thoughtful. “He just kind of watched you all night while we watched television.”
    “I’m interested in him,” I hedged. “I’m just not rushing into anything again.”
    “Because of Aric?”
    “Because I’m just not rushing into anything,” I said. “I don’t feel like being tied down right now.”
    That wasn’t a lie. It wasn’t really the truth either. As soon as I figured out the truth surrounding my needs and wants, I had a feeling everyone would be better off.
    “And you’re completely over Aric?” Kelsey pressed.
    I shifted my eyes. “I’m completely over him.”
    Kelsey leaned back in her chair. “Well, that’s good,” she said. “Because he’s right over there.”
    I jerked my head, my gaze following the line of Kelsey’s pointed finger, sucking in a breath when I saw him. He didn’t look good. He was still as handsome as ever, something told me he always would be, but his appealing countenance was much more haggard than the last time I’d laid eyes on him.
    He was wearing a simple, black T-shirt and blue jeans, and his broad shoulders were stooped. His hair was longer than I remembered, like it hadn’t been cut in months, and his chin was flecked with at least several days’ worth of stubble.
    As if he could feel my eyes on him, he lifted his head – turning from the boy he was talking to – and finding me in the busy room. For a second, it was like all of the oxygen had been stolen from the room, like everyone else ceased to exist. After a few moments, I let out a shaky breath, finally remembering to breathe.
    “He looks bad,” Kelsey said. “I think he’s lost weight.”
    I’d noticed that, too. The man who I shared everything with the previous year looked haunted – and that realization tugged at my heart. When he started moving in my direction, I felt my heart rate increase.
    “Oh, he’s coming over here,” Paris said.
    “I noticed,” I replied, my tone grim.
    “When was the last time you talked to him?” Kelsey asked.
    “That night.”
    “He hasn’t tried to contact you?”
    Oh, he’d tried. He’d called every day for a week. I’d ignored each attempt. Then, on four different occasions during the summer, I’d seen his number pop up on my cell-phone screen. I’d deleted the voicemails without listening to them. It was easier somehow – and harder at the same time.
    Aric paused near the table, clutching his hands together as he regarded the three of us. “Hey.”
    “Hey,” Paris said. “How are you?”
    Aric ran his hand through his hair, clearly unsure of himself. He was nothing like the ego-driven cad I’d met the first time I’d visited the UC. “I’m … okay.”
    “That’s good,” Paris said, glancing at me. “How was your summer?”
    “Long,” Aric said. “It was long. How was your summer?”
    “Just a regular summer,” Paris said.
    I was trying to find my voice – although the endeavor was apparently fruitless. There were a bevy of things trying to escape my mouth, but none of them could quite make