The Truth About Letting Go Read Online Free Page A

she says, pulling at another blade of grass and still seeming angry.
    “Oh, I love those stores!”
    She smiles bitterly and nods. “I’m the reject in the back room.”
    My lips press together, and I take a deep breath. I can’t help Charlotte with these things, and the comfort I came to find isn’t coming. I dust my hands and stand, pulling my shorts down. Charlotte’s woes piling on top of my own are making the pressure in my chest unbearable.
    “I guess I’ll see you at school,” I say, not sure what that will mean.
    “Yeah,” she says. “Back to school.”
    I nod and do a little wave before turning to go. My emotions are so shredded, I can’t feel any worse. Besides, she and I aren’t on the same team. We probably never will be. I don’t like it, but it’s just the way it is.
    Unless…
    As I walk slowly to my house, I think about my bike ride, about my vow, and about stepping off that ladder. What happens if I fall? Will the pain release? Am I strong enough to find out?

 
     
    Chapter 3
     
     
    Mandy takes one glance at me when I get in her car and frowns. Then she does a quick exhale and reaches over to smooth the back of my hair several times. I let her.
    “Heroin chic is so Y2K. But I guess that’s what’s next, right? Kate Moss?”
    I look away, out the window at what's coming. “I’m not going for a trend.”
    All of my colorful spring outfits felt as wrong as everything in my life this morning, so I opted for jeans and a black tank. My hair was a spontaneous decision. However I slept last night, I woke up with it falling in messy waves, so instead of brushing it into smooth submission, I left it. My first break with the rules. One foot off the ladder.
    “Well, anyway, I’ve apparently made the geek patrol’s hit list,” she complains. “It’s all over school what a bitch I am, and it’s infuriating and ridiculous at the same time.”
    I study my nail. “What happened.”
    “Perry Rensselaer asked me to the spring luau. Can you believe that?”
    I shrug. Perry’s a total nerd, but he’s not the worst guy at school. That would be Trevor Martin, resident delinquent.
    “A shrug? That’s all I get from you?”
    “I take it you told him no.”
    “You take it. Of course I told him no!” Her face is an offended frown. “As if it’s not an established fact I only date hot guys. You don’t qualify? Don’t ask.”
    I glance over as she slides a lock of smooth, perfectly highlighted blonde hair behind her shoulder. I think about how different we are despite our usually similar appearance. Mandy’s more the in-your-face type, while I tend to float above. Sure, I get noticed, I’ve just always done my best to dodge the drama. She’s probably more engaged because she grew up here, with the same kids year after year.
    “The critics are just jealous because I don’t have to settle,” she says. “It doesn’t make me shallow, it makes me selective .”
    “Right.” I look away, wondering how Charlotte gets to school. There’s no way she’s walking.
    Our brief conversation has been on my mind since yesterday, and I wonder if whatever we were doing is over now. If we’ll pick up where we left off, with me not even knowing her name. It couldn’t feel more alien to me.
    “What they don’t get is it also means I’m alone. A lot,” Mandy continues. “There are not as many hot guys in high school as you’re led to believe in the books.”
    “Perry’s a nice guy. He worked up the nerve to ask you out, and you shut him down. You had to expect some blowback.”
    She turns wide, horrified eyes on me. “Are you truly on drugs? I can not be pressing my lips against some chicken-chested acne victim’s. It’s gross. I’ll open my eyes and throw up.”
    “Drama queen.”
    “Besides, I’ve gone to school with half these geeks since kindergarten. They should know better.”
    And we’re here.
    For two years, it’s been our thing to wheel into a front parking spot in Mandy’s