Giftchild Read Online Free Page A

smart, he'd sent out a mass text about it, so everyone would know. But then they'd all call to console her, which wasn't what she needed, either.
    When I returned to Rodney, he'd collected the anatomy chart and book from my bed. "Sit," he said. "I'll quiz you."
    I heard Mom and Dad come home ten minutes later. Rodney and I stayed in my room, and Dad didn't swing the door open like he usually did when we were up here alone.
    "I can go anytime," Rodney said. "But I'll stay as long as you want."
    "Thanks," I said. "You can go back to your video game, if you want."
    But he didn't.
    An hour later, when I walked Rodney out to his car, we found Mom sitting alone on the porch swing. She wore sweats, and had her hair pulled up in a ponytail. I could see the remnants of her makeup pooled at the corners of her eyes, and smeared across the outline of her jaw, but she wasn't crying now.
    "Night, Rodney," she said.
    He waved at her. "Goodnight."
    That was one thing I loved about Rodney. He was never awkward with anyone. "I'll see you in the morning," I said to him.
    Rodney nodded. "I'll pick you up." Then he walked to his car, and was gone.
    I stood in the doorway, not sure if I should disappear upstairs, or stay. "Do you want company?"
    "Sure," Mom said.
    I sat down cross-legged beside Mom. The swing creaked as we swayed back and forth.
    "I'm really sorry," I said.
    "Me, too," Mom said. "You'd think I would have learned by now not to let someone into our lives like that."
    Letting Lily in wasn't the problem. She wouldn't have regretted that if she had a baby in her arms right now. "She seemed like she liked us."
    "She did," Mom said. "She liked us, but she loved her baby more. Someday, when you hold your own child, you'll understand."
    I didn't know if I would do either. Athena told me she was never having kids, not after what we'd been through with Mom. What if she had one, or two, and then wanted more and couldn't have them? What if it consumed her, like it did Mom? But me, I just tried not to think about it.
    "What will you do now?" I asked.
    "I don't know," Mom said. "Try again, I guess."
    I dug my nails into my palms. The thought of letting some other girl into our house, letting her sit at our dinner table and tell us that Mom could have her child, made me want to punch Lily right in the nose. I didn't see how Mom could trust another birth mother again.
    I knew I couldn't.
    "Let's talk about something else," Mom said. "How's school?"
    Mom always got really interested in my life right after she lost a child, like she needed to remember that she was actually a mother, even if she wanted more kids than just the two of us. It bugged Athena when Mom did that; Athena just wanted Mom to butt out. But I didn't mind.
    I leaned back, trying to think of a good story to tell her. "We have a physiology test tomorrow," I said. "Facial respiratory anatomy." That wasn't a brilliant tale, but it was on my mind.
    Mom nodded, slowly. "Are you ready?"
    "I'm nervous about it."
    "Did you study?"
    "Yeah. But it all blurs together after a while."
    "I'm sure you'll do fine. You always do."
    "I'll pass," I said. "But Rodney will do better."
    "You'll beat him one of these days."
    "Not likely."
    "It'll happen. But there's got to be something more interesting going on in your life than that."
    "Well, my mother lost a baby," I said.
    Mom gave the swing a hard shove with her feet. "Something that doesn't involve your mother, maybe?"
    "Okay," I said. "Here's some real drama. My friend Kara's boyfriend just dumped her over a text message."
    "Ugh," Mom said, making a pained face. "Dating used to be hard enough. I'm so glad I married your father before the invention of the text."
    I remembered when Mom dated Dad—I was six, and Athena was eight. Mom liked him because he was a gentleman. He called ahead for dates, and even paid for her babysitter, so she could go out without having it add to her single-mom financial stress. That had been the biggest four years in my