Death by Tiara Read Online Free Page B

Scott, my shiny new boyfriend, his Adam’s apple looking extra kissable in the afternoon sun.
    “Hi, there,” he smiled, turning my knees to mush. “I was working a case in the neighborhood and I decided to pop by for a quick hello.”
    “Hi,” I squeaked, trying not to sound too overjoyed.
    “Actually,” he said, stepping inside, “I wasn’t really in the neighborhood. I drove all the way from Culver City. And I didn’t want to just say hello.”
    With that, he wrapped me in his arms for a smooch.
    This is a family novel, so I won’t go in for tawdry details, but let’s just say it was quite a while before we finally came up for air.
    “Hope I’m not interrupting anything,” he said.
    “Not a thing,” I replied, mentally tossing all thoughts of Heather and double-flush toilets out the window.
    We were in the middle of an encore performance of our smooch when suddenly I felt something furry wedging its way between us.
    It was Prozac, of course, who was using Scott’s ankle as her own personal stripper pole.
    “How’s my little love bunny?” Scott asked, swooping her up in his arms.
    She gazed up at him seductively.
    Lonesome without you, big boy.
    Talk about your shameless hussies.
    “I’ll pick you up tomorrow at seven,” Scott said to me as Prozac licked his neck with abandon, “and we’ll drive out to my folks together.”
    “Fine,” I nodded, still a bit numb from his kisses.
    For all I knew, he asked all his dates to meet his parents. I was probably making way too big a deal of this.
    “I sure hope they like me,” I said.
    “Of course, they’ll like you. They’re gonna love you. Just like—”
    Just like I do , were the words I was waiting for him to add. But much to my disappointment, all he said, was, “Just like everybody does.”
    So much for declarations of love.
    “Wish I could stick around,” he said, “but I’ve got to get back to work. My partner thinks I’m out getting donuts.”
    After planting a quick kiss on my nose, he peeled Prozac from his neck and headed out the door.
    I trudged back to my computer with a sigh, forcing myself to wax euphoric over Toiletmasters’ double-flush toilet. I was in the middle of describing its sleek lines and “comfort height” seat when the phone rang.
    “Jaine, honey!” Heather’s voice came zinging across the line. “So sorry I didn’t get back to you sooner, but I’ve had a hectic day at the spa. So many pores, so little time! Anyway, hon, Taylor and I read your lyrics and we love them!”
    Ka-ching! Five hundred clams in the bank!
    “Not only that, Taylor insists that you come with us to the pageant this weekend. She wants you there for moral support. I’ll pay for everything, of course. Room. Food. The works.”
    A weekend in Alta Loco at a teen beauty pageant? Not exactly a dream destination.
    “I’ll even throw in an extra five hundred dollars!” Heather chirped.
    “What time do we check in?”
     
    We agreed to meet in the hotel lobby the next day at 3 PM . I explained to Heather that I’d need to drive up to L.A. for dinner with Scott’s folks, which was fine with her.
    I hung up, feeling quite pleased with myself. Not only was I about to earn an extra five hundred bucks, but it was most gratifying to know that I’d made a connection with Taylor. Clearly the teen had been impressed with my talents and looked upon me as a role model and mentor.
    It felt good having such a positive effect on a girl at such an impressionable age.
    Just as I was basking the glow of my own wonderfulness, about to award myself my own personal Medal of Honor, the phone rang.
    “Jaine. It’s me, Taylor.” For some reason, she was whispering. “About this weekend—”
    “I’m really flattered that you want me along, Taylor. Any advice you need, any moral support, don’t hesitate to ask.”
    “Yeah, right, whatever. Just remember to bring M&M’s, okay?”
    Cancel that Medal of Honor.

Chapter 4
    I set out for Alta Loco the next