After the Fall Read Online Free Page B

married to Kate and she was seeing Luke.

KATE
•
    I love weddings, always have. I’m not usually a romantic, but there’s something about all that unbounded optimism, people hugging one another and toasting the future, that gets me every time. And the enormous power of those words, which are so well-worn but never fail to move me: With this ring I thee wed, with my body I thee worship…. With all that I have, and all that I am … till death do us part . It’s the idea of giving oneself up so utterly to someone else, to something else, something bigger, more meaningful and grander than you both.
    So I guess I was in the mood to fall in love. I was certainly in the mood to cry and feel sentimental and drink too much, all of which probably contributed to the former. And there was a ready-made target in Cary, who stood smiling on my doorstep at exactly the time he had said he would be there.
    It was good to see him again. Cary isn’t stunning in the way Luke is. His hair is ash blond to Luke’s gold, his eyes gray and calm. He doesn’t make women turn around and look back over their shoulder when they pass him in the street, but he’s tall and slim, and has a friendly face. As soon as you meet Cary you feel relaxed, comfortable, as if the two of you went to primary school together or something. Not much upsets him. He wasn’t at all concerned about being a rent-a-date or spending an evening with strangers, and because he was so unself-conscious I soon felt that way too.
    We got to the church a little early, a first for me. I was trying to talk to Cary above the strains of the organ when in the middle of a chord the music suddenly stopped, and I turned to see Sarah materialize at the back of the church. I think I might have gasped, then immediately turned it into a cough so as not to embarrass myself. She looked transformed. Radiant is a cliché for brides, but radiant she was, as if there were candles under her skin. I had the sudden urge to touch her, to see if she was real.
    As she came down the aisle I felt Cary take my hand and gently stroke it. The service murmured in the background while his fingers moved lightly but purposefully over knuckles and wrist, making velvety forays along the five digits, faintly resting on the nail bed before retracing their path. There was a daring and a tenderness in the movements that stopped my breath, made my blood grow thick and languid, banished thought altogether. I felt that were I to look down, his passage would be marked on my skin, like henna on the hands of an Indian bride. When I glanced toward Cary he was looking straight ahead, to all appearances intent on Rick’s declaration to Sarah, though to me this was now only a sideshow compared to the three-ring circus in my lap. Cary’s touch was intimate, but not really sexual. Rather, it was a hypnotism, a promise, an opiate that both aroused and calmed. I was caught completely unprepared as the happy couple paraded back down the aisle, retrieving my hand with both haste and regret, feeling it burn and pulse at the end of my arm like a phantom limb.
    Outside the church someone tapped me on the shoulder and I jumped, nerve endings still tingling. It was Jake, with a nervous-looking brunette in tow.
    “Thought we’d better get the introductions over and done with,” he said, tugging his partner toward him. “I’m Jake,” he continued, looking at Cary curiously, “and this is Samantha.” Samantha smiled, but I was the only one who noticed. After all my fears she was just an average girl, like me.
    “And I’m Cary,” said my partner, reaching across to shake Jake’s hand. “Did you go to college with this bunch? I don’t think I’ve heard Kate mention your name.”
    I nearly snorted with laughter at his cheek, but managed to smile innocently at Jake instead. Jake, however, was not so easily discomforted.
    “Yeah, I know her pretty well. Most of the guys here do,” he replied in a tone that hinted at more than