that expression of yawning tiredness, that half dead expression that suggested not enough sleep or too much alcohol or just plain old continuous stress. Some people were frantically studying their books as they walked, as though a big test was that day and there was just too much to know, too much to expect and they were left awash in despair and hopelessness.
I stopped outside of the coffee shop, hesitating as I stared at it. The corner walls where the door was were made mostly of glass. There were tables inside lining the walls, allowing for students and professors and any other potential patrons to sit at these tables to easily see outside onto the campus. There were several occupied tables now, though the majority of them were empty. Most people were getting their morning coffee to go, aiming to get a little pick me up before the start of class or before a big study session.
Midterms were coming up fairly quickly, after all.
Inside, I saw a young woman sitting at one of the tables. Her books were set out in front of her, though she was staring out the window instead of looking down at them. Her blonde hair was pulled back away from her face, as though she didn ’ t have enough time to do anything with it that morning before leaving. Her make-up was done heavily, making her look older than she probably was, and beneath her large, warm coat, I imagined that she was dressed to impress — in all the wrong ways.
She was a pretty girl, I thought, and her text book and the fact that it was before noon suggested that she was a fairly intelligent, hard working student — all assumptions on my part, of course. But I couldn ’ t shake the feeling of irritation and anger that I got from seeing her sitting there.
I pursed my lips and turned away from the coffee shop as I realized just what it was that bothered me so much about her. She reminded me of Lexie.
Worse, that whole place reminded me of Lexie. She had taken over that place, sitting there with her lattes and her heavy eye makeup, crossing her legs like she owned the place. I no longer felt like it was somewhere I could go to get away from people and the pressures of this ‘ good girl ’ life. Now, it was tainted with her and if I wanted coffee, I was going to have to go somewhere else to get it.
Angrily, I stomped away from my favorite little coffee shop. I was annoyed at being forced away from a place where I usually took refuge. And it was all Lexie ’ s fault.
My mind flashed to the way she was stumbling next to Miranda, both of them laughing hysterically about nothing. I couldn ’ t shake the feeling that something was really wrong with that picture. Miranda was stressing me out a lot, but that didn ’ t mean I wanted her to get into trouble. And the more I got to know her, the more I was pretty sure that Lexie was trouble.
I thought about talking to Miranda, explaining that she shouldn ’ t be trying so hard to ruin her life, but the thought quickly passed right through.
Who was I to tell her things like that?
Shaking my head, I continued to walk towards my class. I ’ d just wait there until it started. I really didn ’ t need any more coffee. Yesterday I ’ d had an awful lot, staying up talking with Derek and Kass.
Derek.
I winced. I was supposed to meet him for coffee after my classes today. He so earnestly seemed interested in me, and I had to admit that I definitely liked him. He was sweet and attractive, and the whole musician thing was pretty hot, even if he wasn ’ t going to be the next big pop star or anything.
My problem wasn ’ t with Derek. It was with the fact that I was having intense dreams about Logan that was my problem. If I could push him away, erase him from my mind, I was sure I could focus on Derek long enough to make things work.
Sighing, I shook my head. This was such a mess.
The dream had been so vivid. I could feel the way he touched me, how his body felt pressed against my skin, how his scent filled my breath. But