What He Explores (What He Wants, Book Twenty-One) Read Online Free Page B

her stomach, fluffed her bangs with her right hand, then stepped off the track and onto the train. I stood there, unable to look away, watching as she moved through the car to the back, until a man wearing a black fedora sat down a few rows in front of her, blocking her from view.
    I turned around and walked down the track back toward the concourse. The air was making it hard to breathe, and I felt that same sensation I’d had back at the apartment, like I couldn’t take in a full breath, like the oxygen was catching on something in my throat and keeping it from reaching my lungs.
    When I stepped onto the concourse, the busy sounds and bustling energy of Grand Central assaulted my senses, and emotion welled in my chest. Betrayal, sadness, hatred, for what she’d done to me.
    A strangled cry escaped my lips and then he was there, like he always was, his arms wrapping around my waist and pulling me close, his hands stroking my hair, his mouth murmuring the words I needed to hear, that it would be okay, that he was there, that he would take care of me.
    “Why, Noah?” I asked. “Why would she do something like that to me?”
    “Because she’s riddled with insecurity,” Noah said. “And she wants to feel important.”
    “Why?” I asked again. I sounded like a child, repeating the same thing over and over again, demanding answers. And I felt like a child, not able to understand and feeling helpless about it.
    “Because someone made her feel small,” he said simply.
    I pulled back from him, not realizing I’d been crying until I saw the smudges my tears had left on his shirt. “Oh no,” I said. “I ruined your expensive shirt.”
    “It’s just a shirt, Charlotte.” His voice was still measured, his tone perfectly controlled.
    “How can you sound so…” I shook my head. “I mean, aren’t you upset that she did that? Now there’s going to be a story about us in the paper.”
    Noah’s dark eyes burned. “I am furious that she upset you. But to show her a reaction would have only made things worse, and would only served to upset you more.”
    He was right. Now that my mother was gone, the thought of Noah yelling at her or giving her a hard time didn’t make me feel better. It would have only escalated things, like throwing kerosene on a tiny campfire.
    “Thank you,” I said to him now.
    He nodded. “I will never, ever let anything bad happen to you. Do you understand that, Charlotte?”
    I nodded, my eyes filling with tears, only this time the emotion was for Noah. I was so grateful to have him by my side that the feeling welled up in my chest, almost overwhelming.
    “I love you,” he whispered and kissed me softly. “I love you so much.”
    “I love you too so much,” I said, and he grinned.
    “You have had a very rough day, baby. We need to get you home and get you into the bath. I will make you dinner. “ He leaned in close to me, pressing his lips to my neck before tilting his face and whispering into my ear. “And then I will take you to bed.”
    Anticipation skipped up my spine. “To bed?” I asked.
    “Yes, baby. To bed. And it will hurt, Charlotte. It will hurt so good.”
    A warm ache settled between my legs and I pulled back, slipping my hand into his. “Okay,” I said. “Let’s go.”
    We turned around and began to make our way toward the main exit of the train station, to where Noah’s car was parked on 42 nd Street.
    And that was when I spotted her.
    Bella.
    The girl from the diner we’d gone to earlier in Queens, the one I’d followed into the back of the restaurant, the one who’d had a tattoo of Lameuix’s name on her back. The one whose pictures had been on Ryan Aqualino’s phone.
    “Hey,” I said to Noah. “Isn’t that Bella?”
    We watched as she began to talk to a man wearing a leather jacket. He had a green fatigue backpack slung over his shoulder and he was tapping his foot on the ground. His eyes darted around the train station nervously.
    Bella, on the