We Are Legion (We Are Bob) (Bobiverse Book 1) Read Online Free Page A

driving a garbage truck made me laugh out loud.
    “…So we can find it difficult to get the right replicant for the right job. And a certain percentage go insane anyway after a while.”
    That was a sobering thought. I had a bad feeling that I might be looking down that particular chasm later. Right now, this all felt like it was happening to someone else. Questions about individuality and the existence of souls poked at the edge of my awareness. With an effort I pushed them away, to concentrate on the now.
    “Eighty percent failure rate kind of sucks, doc. How do you stay in business?”
    “One success, Bob, can be installed in many units. Most of the mining equipment in operation today is controlled by one Rudolf Kazini, who was a miner in his former life as well. Matching temperament to task is the key.” The doctor hesitated for a moment, then added, “And, of course, we cultivate multiple candidates.”
    I tried to raise my non-existent eyebrows and I was annoyed when nothing happened. “Am I in a competition, then?”
    “Well, yes and no. We have activated five candidates for this project. Statistically, four of you will go insane and be purged. If more than one of you gets through the training phase with your sanity intact, then yes, we’ll have to make a choice. The project requires only one replicant.”
    “And the loser?”
    Dr. Landers shrugged. “Garbage truck. Or maybe just stored pending another opportunity.”
    Not good. Not good at all. The prospect of going insane wasn’t exactly at the top of my bucket list, but the idea of cheating death—more or less—then just being relegated to menial labor, really sucked. Being turned off, even more so. It would appear that I was in a competition, and one with the highest of stakes for me.
    I was going to have to take this very seriously. And I would have to assume that the other candidates were equally well suited to whatever task the project required. I would simply have to be better. And the first step was information-gathering.
    “So, what’s the job?”
    “There’s really no point in discussing specifics at this early stage. It would be a distraction, at best.”
    Well, no joy, there. “Can you tell me about my opponents?”
    “No, Bob. There’s no reason to. You’ll never meet them. Best that you not humanize them in any way.”
    That made sense, in a very cold, clinical way. But I wasn’t making much headway on the information-gathering front, so far.
    “Okay. Next question. Why am I not more panicked about all of this? This is absolutely bizarre. I’m dead. I mean, original me is dead. I’m a computer program. I’m property . Why am I not running in tight little circles, waving my hands in the air? Apart from the obvious reason, I mean.”
    The doctor smirked, but he didn’t really seem amused. “We can’t modify your personality, Bob. It’s an emergent property. Attempts to do so have resulted in, ah, non-viable subjects. So it’s all or nothing. But we can control the endocrine simulation routines. Panic depends on a feedback loop involving adrenaline. We simply limit that. You can’t panic or get angry or frightened, you can only be deeply concerned, so to speak.”
    “And with that, you still have an 80% failure rate?” I tried to wave a hand. I had always talked with my hands a lot, so when that failed as well, I said in exasperation, “Say, am I going to get some appendages at some point? This Jack the Bodiless business is getting on my nerves, er, circuits. Whatever.”
    Dr. Landers nodded. “Actually, Bob, I think we’ve made very good progress today. You were obviously a very rational person and are handling this better than I could have hoped for. We’ll continue tomorrow, and I’ll see if I can get you some peripherals.”
    Dr. Landers lifted his tablet and poked at it.
    “Wait, no, I—”

Bob – June 25, 2133
    I snapped back to consciousness. I could see that Dr. Landers wore a different colored shirt, still