Urge to Kill (1) Read Online Free Page A

reception area with its curved desk and potted plants, Clive took the lift to the office. As the doors opened, he was shocked to find Ben facing him. The last of his anger vanished, replaced with a tingle of excitement, which left him unable to speak.
    With his dark curly hair and ready smile, Ben had an indefinable essence about him, making Clive’s heart thump as if it were trying to burst out and declare itself. He had felt the attraction from the start, even though in many ways they were complete opposites.
    Ben was cheerful, open, outgoing, and American. Always ready to help and inclined to be untidy, immediate. Whereas Clive was compulsively neat, and although he could easily charm when it was necessary, he made sure his inner self was never exposed.
    ‘Hello.’ The voice sounded unlike his own.
    ‘Hi. Just finishing that contract.’ Ben seemed almost as shocked as Clive but he was still able to produce that wide grin.
    As Ben stood aside for him to leave the lift, he fought to say something intelligent. ‘Forgot my mobile,’ he mumbled, feeling like an awkward teen.
    ‘I’ll wait on and go down with you.’
    Clive nodded and made a show of going into his office to open and shut desk drawers. As he made his way back to the lift, he was thinking about how he could prolong this chance meeting. Ben saved him the trouble.
    ‘Fancy a drink or will you have to get back?’
    ‘No. That would be good.’ He hoped he hadn’t sounded too eager, for the thought of sitting across from Ben sharing a casual drink had been just one of his fantasies over the last few months. Now that it was all happening, he felt unready, out of control, yet he knew he must seize the opportunity.
    Ben led the way to a cosy looking pub, The Brown Horse, just off the Parade. It didn’t look like the type of place he would take Mother. It was obvious Ben had been here before as he pointed out a small corner table set against the far wall where the lighting was low and comfortable.
    ‘There’s a space. Grab a seat, and I’ll get a round in? What’s your poison? Real ale?’
    Clive nodded. He didn’t mind drinking Mother’s bath water just as long as he could sit here quietly with Ben, although he hadn’t the slightest idea what he wanted to say or even how to say it.
    He made his way through the office workers reviving themselves before the drive home to the table Ben had pointed out, settling himself with his back to the wall to watch Ben as he waited at the bar. When Ben turned to flash him a smile, Clive felt something jerk in the region of his heart. Was this love? Love for someone else was alien to him. Could he allow such an unaccustomed feeling to enter his life? Clive had never thought of himself as gay, either, but maybe this strange exhilaration meant he was.
    Feeling confused, he was still searching for topics of conversation when Ben returned with the drinks. Luckily, Ben, like most Americans, wasn’t so tongue tied, and as he responded he felt himself relax.
    Ben placed the pints on the table while he put the jingle of change in his pocket. Clive quickly slid a bar mat under each glass and Ben laughed as he sat down opposite.
    ‘Obsessional.’ He shook his head sadly.
    He realised how it looked and quickly covered his tracks. ‘Living with Mother, I’m afraid.’ Clive made sure that, after taking a large, nervous gulp of his drink, he replaced the glass firmly on the table, even if it did go against his instincts.
    ‘They sometimes have a group on here. A folksy, pop sort of mix.’
    ‘Are they any good?’ Clive was trying to sound like he understood the kind of event Ben was describing.
    ‘Not bad. The lead is a character, should have been a stand-up. He picks on someone in the crowd and, as long as it’s not you, it’s wild.’
    He could see from Ben’s face that he enjoyed that sort of evening and knew he would be willing to endure all just to be with him. ‘So, when are they on again?’
    ‘Won’t be till