Tragic Desires Read Online Free Page A

the tiniest hint of a smile. It doesn’t last because I know this is only temporary. The monster that has invaded my body will return all too soon, taking my pleasure away with it.
    As the band play s, I head to the dance floor and join the others as they move to the beat. I’m enjoying myself but all too soon, it’s closing time, so I make my way home. When I arrive, I know the morning will bring pain, and lots of it. I make sure the curtains are drawn as tightly as possible, not allowing even a slit of light through. Then I put an extra pillow next to me so if I wake up and my head is splitting open, I can put the pillow over it. The last thing I think of before drifting off is my mom and how much I miss her. I wish she were here to help me. She would find a way to get rid of my pain. I know she would.
     
     
    The axe man is back and I’m his victim. I beg him to decapitate me and get it over with, but he ignores me again. I roll off my bed and under it, writhing in pain. This room can’t be dark enough. After a few moments, I know I need to get my pills so I rock to my knees and struggle to the bathroom. Fumbling around, I locate them and pray they work. I’m shaking so badly, the water I attempt to drink pours everywhere except into my mouth. I pull off my shirt because now it’s soaked and I crawl back under my bed.
    In the distance, I hear a girl moaning. Deep in my mind, I recognize the voice but I never put two and two together that the girl is me. I want to injure myself somewhere else on my body, just so that I can forget how bad my head hurts for a moment. My mouth has a metallic taste, so I know I’ve bitten my tongue, cheek, or lip, but I don’t feel it. Right now, I would bargain with the devil to stop this pain. It’s relentless.
    I crawl back to the bathroom and take another pill. Ice. I need some ice to put on my head, but I don’t know if I can make it to the freezer. Knowing I must try, I set off for the kitchen. It takes me a few minutes because I have to stop several times before I get there. Finding a Ziploc is nearly impossible—my brain isn’t functioning properly right now. Getting ice into this bag is like climbing Mt. Everest. More cubes land on the floor than inside the bag. Whoever thought such a simple task could be so difficult and painful? When I finally succeed, I don’t have the strength to do anything but stay on the kitchen floor, holding the baggie to my head.
    Crying only makes the pain worse, but my brain won’t listen to me. It seems that crying and migraines go hand in hand, one bringing the other. The pain never gets better, but I become drowsy enough that I doze off.
     
    “Gemini, where are you?” Her voice is always tinged with worry when she doesn’t immediately see me.
    “I’m here, Mom. Don’t be such a worrywart.”
    “You know I can’t help it. Don’t leave my side when we’re out.”
    “But I was only …”
    “Gemini, I don’t want any back talk.”
    “Yes, ma’am.”
    I can’t understand why she gets so out of sorts when she doesn’t have her eye on me for a second.
    “Mom?”
    “Yes, honey ?”
    “Can I go to camp this summer?”
    “Gemini, we’ve talked about this before.”
    “But all the other kids are going. I’m the only one who doesn’t and I really want to.”
    “I know you do. But you know how I feel about it.”
    “I swear I won’t get hurt.”
    “Gemini, you know what my answer is.”
    “Okay.”
     
    Images flash through my mind and now I’m celebrating my sixteenth birthday. I’m hoping for a car, but I doubt I’ll get one.
     
    “Happy birthday, sweetie!”
    “Thanks , Mom!”
    She’s carrying a perfectly decorated cake with sixteen glowing candles. And then she sings me the traditional Happy Birthday song. When she finishes, she squeezes me so hard I think I’m going to crack in half.
    “Gemini, I love you so much.”
    “I love you too, Mom. Is it chocolate?”
    “You’re going to have to cut it to find