The Year Nick McGowan Came to Stay Read Online Free Page B

bedroom walls. I create a look that says Ramones lover , enigma, someone who’s cool. And then Mum knocks on the door and asks if I want another Milo.
    At one p.m. on Saturday I ring Zoë and invite her over for a swim, and to look at my new boudoir. She arrives ten minutes later.
    â€˜Here it is,’ I say, ushering her into my new, bigger, air-conned bedroom.
    I watch Zoë take it all in. I watch her eyes move from the bed to the bookcase to the posters on the walls. And then she turns to me, hands on hips and eyebrows raised.
    â€˜What?’ I fold my arms across my chest.
    â€˜Since when do you listen to the Ramones?’
    â€˜I’ve always loved the Ramones,’ I say, perhaps not quite as convincingly as I would have hoped.
    â€˜Name one of their songs.’
    â€˜ “I’m Not Jesus”.’
    â€˜Really?’
    I nod.
    â€˜Hmmm, okaaay. Then name two of their albums.’
    â€˜ Halfway to Sanity and Animal Boy .’
    Zoë purses her lips and narrows her eyes, as though she suspects I’m wearing an earpiece and am being fed the correct answers by some outside mole.
    â€˜What’s the name of the lead singer?’
    She’s got me, dammit. I bite my lip.
    â€˜Umm . . . dunno.’
    That’s when the penny drops. ‘This is the band that Nick McGowan said he liked. You’re doing this to impress him. Nick McGowan. You’re whoring your music taste to impress Nick McGowan!’
    â€˜Okay, fine. Maybe I am. But there is no way he was going to see the Kirk Cameron poster I had up in my room.’
    â€˜Now just hang on a second. There is nothing, I repeat, nothing wrong with Kirk Cameron. That was a great poster. His eyes followed you around the room. I always felt like he was trying to hit on me.’
    â€˜Oh, God.’ I flop down onto my new double bed. ‘I’m screwed.’
    â€˜You keep saying that.’
    â€˜Well it’s true. Yesterday I made a complete dick of myself in front of Nick McGowan in the library.’
    â€˜Sure,’ says Zoë.
    I sit up. ‘You’re not supposed to agree with me. You’re my friend. You’re supposed to say that things aren’t as bad as they seem, that there’s a solution here. That everything will work out okay.’
    I lie back down.
    â€˜But you made up a pretend boyfriend.’
    I sit up again. ‘I know I made up a pretend boyfriend. And thanks for your help, by the way.Your “he could beat the hell out of you” contribution made it sound like I was dating Jack Nicholson’s character in The Shining .’
    I lie back down.
    â€˜You know you’re gonna have to find yourself a boyfriend.’
    I sit up again. ‘I know .’
    I stay up. I swing my legs over the edge of the bed and stare at Zoë on the floor. Zoë, who is currently balancing my Hello Kitty pillow on her forehead.
    â€˜The question is, what am I going to do about it? And take my Hello Kitty pillow off your head. You’ll get make-up on it.’
    Zoë does her best horizontal volleyball spike and Kitty’s fat little cat head comes sailing up towards me.
    â€˜Look, it’s no biggie. All you have to do is break up with your pretend boyfriend some time next week. End of story.’
    â€˜Right. Right. Of course. Break up with him. That’s easy enough. I’ll just casually drop into a conversation next week that Paul and I have broken up.’
    Now it’s her turn to sit up. ‘ Paul ? Your pretend boyfriend is called Paul ?’
    â€˜What’s wrong with Paul?’
    â€˜It reminds me of Paul Fitch. Remember how bad he was at sport in Year 9? Remember how everyone used to call him Cerebral-Paulsy?’
    â€˜Uh, no. I remember how you used to call him Cerebral-Paulsy. And it was disgraceful. And – now that I think about it – you also convinced everyone to start calling me Ratshit.’
    â€˜Sozzy,’ she says.