The Posthumous Memoirs of Bras Cubas Read Online Free Page B

insert this ingenious idea into the speech he was making at the edge of my grave: “You who knew him, gentlemen, can say with me that nature appears to be weeping over the irreparable loss of one of the finest characters humanity has been honored with. This somber air, these drops from heaven, those dark clouds that cover the blue like funeral crepe, all of it is the cruel and terrible grief thatgnaws at nature and at my deepest insides; all that is sublime praise for our illustrious deceased.”
    Good and faithful friend! No, I don’t regret the twenty bonds I left you. And that was how I reached the closure of my days. That was how I set out for Hamlet’s undiscovered country without the anxieties or doubts of the young prince, but, rather, slow and lumbering, like someone leaving the spectacle late. Late and bored. Some nine or ten people had seen me leave, among them three ladies: my sister Sabina, married to Cotrim—their daughter, a lily of the valley,—and … Be patient! In just a little while I’ll tell you who the third lady was. Be content with knowing that the unnamed one, even though not a relative, suffered more than the relatives did. It’s true. She suffered more. I’m not saying that she wailed, I’m not saying that she rolled on the ground in convulsions, or that my passing was a highly dramatic thing … An old bachelor who expires at the age of sixty-four doesn’t seem to gather up all the elements of a tragedy in himself. And even if that were the case, what least suited that unnamed lady was to show such feelings. Standing by the head of the bed, her eyes cloudy, her mouth half open, the sad lady had a hard time believing my extinction.
    “Dead! Dead!” she kept saying to herself.
    And her imagination, like the storks that an illustrious traveler watched taking flight from the Ilissus on their way to African shores without the hindrance of ruins and times—that lady’s imagination also flew over the present rubble to the shores of a youthful Africa … Let it go. We’ll get there later on. We’ll go there when I get my early years back. Now I want to die peacefully, methodically, listening to the ladies sobbing, the men talking softly, the rain drumming on the caladium leaves of my suburban home, and the strident sound of a knife a grinder is sharpening outside by a harness-maker’s door. I swear to you that the orchestra of death was not at all as sad as it might have seemed. From a certain point on it even got to be delightful. Life was thrashing about in my chest with the surging of an ocean wave. My consciousness was evaporating. I was descending into physical and moral immobility and my body was turning into a plant, a stone, mud, nothing at all.
    I died of pneumonia, yet if I tell my reader that it wasn’t so much the pneumonia that caused my death but a magnificent and useful idea he might not believe me and, nevertheless, it’s the truth. Let me explain briefly. You can judge for yourself.

II
The Poultice
     
    As it so happened, one day in the morning while I was strolling about my place an idea started to hang from the trapeze I have in my brain. Once hanging there it began to wave its arms and legs and execute the most daring antics of a tightrope-walker that anyone could imagine. I let myself stand there contemplating it. Suddenly it took a great leap, extended its arms and legs until it took on the shape of an X: decipher me or I’ll devour you.
    That idea was nothing less than the invention of a sublime remedy, an antihypochondriacal poultice, destined to alleviate our melancholy humanity. In the patent application that I drew up afterward I brought that truly Christian product to the government’s attention. I didn’t hide from friends, however, the pecuniary rewards that would of needs result from the distribution of a product with such far-reaching and profound effects. But now that I’m on the other side of life I can confess everything: what mainly influenced me