The Pirates! in an Adventure with the Romantics Read Online Free Page B

“like a gang”.’
    ‘Are you sure? You do seem a lot like a gang. You’ve obviously got a brave and headstrong leader,’ he waved at Byron, who was too busy laughing at a spoon with a mermaid drawn on it to notice, ‘a plucky girl,’ he indicated Mary, who just arched an eyebrow and went on thoughtfully licking her ham and jam popsicle, ‘and a slightly ratty one,’ he pointed back at Shelley, who frowned. ‘So you’re pretty much there. Though you should probably get a loyal dog with a sensitive nose as well. Always find it’s best for gangs to have a loyal dog with a sensitive nose. And matching jackets! The jackets could have some romantic emblem on the back. An albatross? They mate for life, you see, so it’s one of the most romantic creatures. Though it might look too much like a seagull unless you write the word albatross underneath it. Only then people could think your gang was called “the Albatrosses” rather than “the Romantics”. Doesn’t have to be an albatross. I’m just brainstorming here.’
    ‘It’s not a gang,’ Shelley persisted, sounding petulant. ‘In fact, we don’t approve of any sort of organisations. We believe in the individual! It’s a whole new way of looking at life.’
    ‘Oh, right, got you,’ lied the Captain.
    Shelley leaned forward, and his eyes blazed a bit. ‘We have a dream, Captain. Imagine, if you will, a world run not by politicians . . . but by artists.’
    ‘That sounds terrible,’ blurted out Jennifer, because she was the crew member who tended to say out loud what the rest of the crew was thinking.
    The poet didn’t appear to have noticed. ‘The world has become so drab of late,’ he went on. ‘Everything’s about logic and industry and science and things being “rational”. Well, we reject all of that!’
    ‘But surely,’ said Jennifer, ‘science and “being rational” are quite good? You know. Advances in medicine. Technological innovation. Not being in thrall to mumbo-jumbo superstitions?’
    ‘I’m afraid you have a terribly Western view of culture, young lady. Can science write you a poem? Can medicine paint you a landscape? Can engineering make your spirits soar?’ Shelley sat back and looked pleased with himself.
    ‘It can build you a sewer,’ pointed out Jennifer. ‘I quite like working sewers.’ She turned to Byron and Mary. ‘You all go along with this romantic stuff, do you?’
    Byron shrugged. ‘Percy’s the theoretical one. I tend to be a bit more . . .’ he fished for a description. ‘Hands on. Do you know, I once punched a donkey? For no reason at all! Just the simple thrill of living in the moment. If you ask me, the key to a really artistic way of life is total impulsiveness. No thinking things through if you can possibly help it.’ 10
    ‘Yes, I’m like that,’ said the Captain, offering Mary some zucchini blinis. ‘The other week I refused to eat anything that wasn’t a suckling pig and/or drizzled in honey. Pure impulse.’
    ‘Exactly! I can see we’re cut from the same cloth, you and I. Men who must constantly breathe in all the sensual delights the world has to offer, lest we suffocate without them.’ Byron threw out his arms expansively. ‘Tell me, Captain, do you ever just find you’ve spent the entire day marvelling at how nice your own hair is?’
    ‘All the time!’
    ‘Me too!’
    ‘Oh good grief,’ muttered the pirate in red, burying his face in a napkin. ‘There are two of them.’
     
     
    After the feast, the pirates served coffee and chocolates in the Captain’s cabin and refused the Romantics’ offers to help wash up, on the grounds that they were paying guests. Because it was the nineteenth century people had to make their own after-dinner entertainments – they couldn’t just slump in front of old Friends episodes and say, ‘Oh, this is the season when Chandler was on crack, look how thin he is,’ like they do nowadays – so Shelley suggested they play a game.
    ‘It’s a