Tattoos: A Novel Read Online Free Page B

where kids had to be poked and prodded like miniature pincushions and still died, made me want to quit working there all together. It would have been easy to close that chapter in my life and not have to witness it anymore. Because just seeing that empty bed, where a five year old boy named Neil had spent six long months fighting for his life, but was now gone forever, shook the core of my being. It made me want to run away and never look back. I was a volunteer there, I didn’t need to be there…not really.
    “Hey Jax.”  
    I felt the tug at the back of my coveralls and turned to face six-year-old Cindy. She stared up at me with her huge brown eyes. Her tiny lips were bowed into a smile and her bald head was covered in a downy fuzz, just beginning to grow back. She appeared so tiny and cherub-like, in her pink Barbie pajamas, that I wanted to take her into my arms and away from it all, away from her cancer.
      In that moment all the feelings I’d had about taking off, evaporated. Right in front of me was the reason why I was there, in a place that some people might consider the most depressing environment in the world. Cindy put her hand up for a fist pump, something I’d taught her soon after she’d arrived on the wing. I fist pumped her and crouched down, so our eyes were level.
    “What are you doing up so early?” I asked softly. The breakfast trays hadn’t even arrived yet. Morning didn’t officially start on the ward until they came.
    Cindy shrugged her petite shoulders. She stared at the floor for a few moments before she spoke.
    “Can’t sleep, because…” She thumbed over her shoulder toward Neil’s room. The simple motion made my heart lurch. I should have known better than to ask her why she was up. Neil and her had been inseparable.
    “Mom said Neil’s gone to Heaven. I just wish he had taken me with him. We’re best friends and best friends do everything together, don’t they?”  
    She stared at me with an innocence that threatened to break my steely composure.
    I swallowed a few times before I attempted to speak. The last thing I could do was lose it in front of Cindy. She needed solid answers not soppy tears.
    “I know if Neil could take anyone to Heaven with him it would have been you. But you see Cindy, Heaven is a place we get an invitation to, and if you don’t get an invitation…” I shrugged for effect. “Well you just can’t go.”
    She seemed to consider what I’d said. “Is it like when some people get an invitation to a Birthday Party and some people don’t?”
    “That’s exactly what it’s like,” I said, smiling.
      “Birthday parties are fun.” She shot me a sheepish look and shrugged. “I prolly would have gone too if I’d gotten an invitation,” she said. She crossed her arms over her chest and suddenly looked serious. “Do you think I’ll get an invitation there too some day?”  
    I nodded. “Of course you will, everyone gets an invitation to Heaven, we just don’t know when we’re going to get it. When you do get your invitation, Neil will be waiting there for you and he won’t be sick anymore.” I prayed her invitation didn’t come soon.
    A grin lit up Cindy’s face. I instinctively sighed, thankful that I’d in the smallest way made her understand that Neil hadn’t left to hurt her.
    “Thanks Jax,” she said. She lifted her hand for another fist pump. “Laters,” she said. She skipped down the hall, her bunny slippers not making a sound on the polished floor.  
    “Morning Jax.”  
    I lifted my gaze at the sound of my name and spotted Chip. His huge pot belly pushed at the buttons of his sky blue long-sleeved shirt. He strode down the hall toward me. The huge key ring that he had strapped to the waistband of his black work pants, jingled as he approached. I was sure the ring held every key to every door in the hospital. He slid a hand over the top of his head, as if he were smoothing his hair, the only problem was he didn’t have