Surprises According to Humphrey Read Online Free Page B

coming down the hall when I found your
rat
out here!”
    “For goodness’ sake.” Mrs. Brisbane leaned down and picked up the ball. “How did you get out here?”
    “You created a very dangerous situation,” said Mrs. Wright. “Someone could trip over him and get hurt.”
    “Well, no one did,” said Mrs. Brisbane. “Don’t worry, it won’t happen again.”
    Mrs. Wright sniffed loudly. “Still, I must report this to Mr. Morales.”
    “Do whatever you think you should.” Mrs. Brisbane sounded a little snippy, and I was GLAD-GLAD-GLAD. “Come on, Humphrey.”
    My classmates gathered at the door, waiting for my return.
    “Back in your seats,” Mrs. Brisbane told them. “And you, Humphrey, are going back in your cage.”
    I was so happy to be home, I took a long drink of water, then headed straight for my sleeping hut and a nice long doze.
    WHISTLE: A shiny device that, when someone blows in it, makes an earsplitting sound that can seriously hurt the delicate ears of small creatures like hamsters.
Use whistles sparingly, if at all.
(Some humans can whistle without a device, but hamsters never can.)
    Humphrey’s Dictionary of Wonderful Words

Spring Fever

    W ait-for-the-Bell-Garth!” Mrs. Brisbane’s words jolted me from my nap.
    Garth always jumped out of his chair just before the bell rang for recess, lunch or the end of the day. When Mrs. Brisbane reminded him, he sat back down until the bell actually rang.
    “Now you may go, class,” Mrs. Brisbane said.
    Once the room was empty, she shuffled the papers on her desk. Then the door opened and in came Principal Morales.
    “Got a second, Sue?” he asked.
    “Of course,” Mrs. Brisbane greeted him. “What can I do for you?”
    “Ruth Wright put in a complaint. It’s about…”
    Mrs. Brisbane finished his sentence. “Humphrey.”
    The principal smiled. “Yeah. Just try and keep him in the classroom.”
    “I intend to,” said Mrs. Brisbane.
    “Don’t worry.” Mr. Morales chuckled. “She also complained about the squeaky door in the cafeteria, somefingerprints on the trophy case and the fact that the clocks are running thirty seconds slow.”
    “Well, she teaches P.E. I guess rules are very important to her.”
    Mr. Morales strolled over to my cage. “So Humphrey had a little adventure today? Maybe he has spring fever,” he said.
    “I think the whole class does,” Mrs. Brisbane answered. “It happens every year. The weather turns nice and the class gets silly.”
    The principal leaned in close to my cage. “Well, no more silliness from you, Humphrey. You stay put.”
    “I will try because that Mrs. Wright is MEAN-MEAN-MEAN!” I squeaked.
    Mr. Morales chuckled. “Aw, don’t let it bother you, Humphrey. Mrs. Wright likes to complain.”
    Then he turned back to Mrs. Brisbane. “Don’t forget, deadline’s coming up, Sue.”
    “Sorry. I forgot. I’ll write myself a note.”
    Mr. Morales smiled. “Great.”
    The bell rang again, and the principal excused himself. In seconds, my classmates came racing back into the room, pink-cheeked, out of breath and smiling. At least most of them were smiling.
    “Good game, Tabby,” Seth told Tabitha. “We almost won.”
    “Yeah, we would have if it wasn’t for you-know-who,” she answered.
    Then she glanced at Garth, who was right behind her. He definitely wasn’t smiling.
    “Take your seats, children,” Mrs. Brisbane said. “Get out your social studies books and turn to page 112 .”
    Sometimes being a classroom hamster is like being a detective. You hear little bits of conversation and try to figure out what’s going on. Like, what was that about Mrs. Brisbane forgetting something Mr. Morales wanted? She never forgets anything! And why did Tabitha say “you-know-who” instead of Garth’s name? And why wasn’t Garth happy, like everybody else?
    I was sorting out my thoughts when something even more puzzling happened.
    Rather than reading his social studies book, Garth was writing