S.E.C.R.E.T.: An Erotic Novel Read Online Free Page B

became open to the idea that I should accept this, accept the help from S.E.C.R.E.T.
     But when he silently entered the hotel room and closed the door behind him, I knew
     I wanted to go through with it …
    I could feel my own heart beat as though
I
was in the hotel room as this stranger opened the door …
    This guy! What can I say? Matilda was right. He was so damn sexy … he walked towards
     me slowly like a cat, and I backed away until the bed stopped me at the back of my
     knees. And then he sent me backwards on the bed with a gentle nudge, lifted my skirt
     and parted my legs. I pulled a pillow over my face after he uttered the only words
     he’d say that day: You are so fucking beautiful. And then he brought me into a kind
     of ecstasy I can’t really describe here but I will try …
    I shut the book again. It was wrong to read this. It was so raw. This was none of
     my business. I had to stop.
    After one more Step. Then I’d stop. Then I would
most definitely
put this book away.
    I opened it randomly to the middle, flashing forward, I assumed, through pages of
     sexy words:
    Wow. First off, it was weird! I won’t lie. But yet it had this incredible filling
     effect. That’s the only way to describe it. Like I had it all inside me. Like I couldn’t
     go any further and then I found I could. I didn’t care how loud I was being. Hishands were working me over all the while. It felt so incredible! Thank God the Mansion
     is soundproof, or so I’m told. It must be; otherwise everyone would know what was
     happening in each of these rooms. But I’ll tell you, the best sensation came from
     the other guy, Olivier, who lay beneath me, my lovely dark-haired stranger with a
     full arm of tattoos, who was sucking on my …
    I snapped the book closed. Okay, I had to stop. This was too much. Two men? At once?
     I looked to the top of the page. This was Step Five:
Fearlessness
. I was shocked that I felt damp between the legs. I didn’t normally read erotic stuff,
     and when I came across pornography by accident, I rarely found it arousing. But this?
     This was all about
desire
. I wanted to read the whole thing, but no, I wouldn’t. I held the book shut tight
     in my lap.
    She didn’t seem the type, Pauline, with her short hair and her clean looks. But what’s
     “the type”? What’s the furthest I’d ever gone with a man? The riskiest? A giggly handjob
     in a movie theater in high school with a boy I dated when Scott and I were on a “break.”
     I’d given blowjobs. Maybe not well, and not always to completion. Sexually speaking,
     I was sorely inexperienced. Dixie had rolled onto her back in a posture that was appropriately
     lewd.
    “Oh, kitty, you’ve probably had more fun in the streets than I’ve had in my bedroom.”
    I had to put the notebook away. To read any more of it would be to violate Pauline’s
     privacy irrevocably, and todrive myself to distraction. I got up and almost angrily shoved the book deep into
     the drawer of the telephone table by my front door. After ten minutes, I moved it
     to a pocket of an old ski jacket I had brought from Michigan and left hanging in the
     back of the closet. Still, the book called for me. Then I put it in the broiler beneath
     the gas stove. But what if the pilot light ignited it?
    I decided to put the notebook in my purse so I wouldn’t forget to bring it to work
     the next day, in case Pauline came back to retrieve it. Oh God, what if she thinks
     I read it? But how could I not? Well, at least I didn’t read all of it, I thought,
     taking the notebook out of my purse and finally locking it in the trunk of my car.

    Two days later, after the lunch rush died down, the door chimes signaled the arrival
     of Pauline. My stomach lurched, like she was coming to arrest me. This time she wasn’t
     with her sexy man but with a beautiful older woman, perhaps fifty or a well-preserved
     sixty with red wavy hair, wearing a pale coral tunic. They were both a