Saint Nicholas Read Online Free Page B

he was trying to figure it all out. His head cocked slightly to the side, the contemplative grin on his lips—it was all very pensive, and I just sat there, staring back at him for the longest time, wishing that I could listen to him talk forever without having to say a word.
    “I should go,” I said as the sun began to drop in the sky.
    Nicholas didn’t protest, but I could see the disappointment in his eyes as he stood up and wrapped his arms around me. We’d barely even breached the surface of who we were as people, or what this was we were experiencing, but it didn’t matter. With him I felt like I already knew, and all that other stuff was just filler. Yeah, it was important to me that he was a good person and he cared about who I was, not just what I could do for him, but honestly that was the furthest thing from my mind as his body pressed against mine and I could finally breathe him in the way I’d wanted to.
    He didn’t hold on tight, but just held me close to him. Gentle. I could hear his heart thumping against his chest, beating fast like mine. This was so new for the both of us, and I wanted to look up into his eyes and tell him it was okay, that there was nothing to be nervous about, but I knew that wasn’t the case. There was a whole mess of stuff to be nervous about, and Nicholas didn’t know any of it.
    I’d tell him, in time, but for now I just wanted to feel him close to me for a while before the other shoe dropped, because when it did I didn’t know if I could count on him to stick around.

    * * *

    We spent the entire week joined at the hip. Just the two of us. We ran around Hell’s Kitchen like a couple of demons, doing everything and anything there was to do together. We visited the bakeries, sat in lobbies of posh hotels until we got kicked out for making too much noise, window shopped at places like Fine and Dandy , and Tagg , and we spent all day Sunday at the Hell’s Kitchen Flea Market , an outdoor smorgasbord where you can find anything from clothes and food, to knick-knacks and hidden treasures. It was perfect, and the entire time Nicholas never let go of my hand and always kept me close, like he knew that was exactly what I needed to feel safe.
    We talked, too. A lot. Well, mostly him, but that was okay. I could listen to his voice for hours and never get tired of it. Its deep, soothing sound was like honey in my heart, and each time he opened his mouth I looked at him and saw the passion in his eyes with every word he spoke. It filled me with the same feeling, like I could do anything in the world as long as I was by his side. Even stand up to my father, which was scary in its own right, but exhilarating at the same time because no other person had ever made me feel like that. Nicholas was the first, and I forever wanted him to be my last.
    Carrying around our own twisty cones, we licked vanilla ice cream, walking hand-in-hand through the various vendors, stopping to admire their wares every so often. I paused to look at some tiny crystal animals on display, marveling over the intricate detail on a dolphin breaking through the waves, turning to smile at Nicholas, who had his eyes trained on me.
    “What?” I blushed, busying myself with my ice cream.
    “Nothing. It’s just…you’re so beautiful when you’re happy.”
    I held his gaze, looking at him to see if this was some kind of angle he was playing, but there was nothing in those eyes but sincerity, and it made my heart swell with emotion. No one had ever called me beautiful before. Not like that. When I was a kid, maybe. Dressed in a pretty dress or whatever. Oh, she’s so beautiful . But the way Nicholas said it, like he meant it, it was music to my ears.
    “You got a nice smile, too,” he beamed.
    “Stop it,” I teased, bopping him on the nose with my ice cream. It left a splotch of white vanilla that looked hilarious contrasted against his olive skin, and I burst out in a fit of laughter as Nicholas stood there,