finally, he lets me go, laying me back down on the hospital bed.
He nods to the doctor, who infuses my I.V. with a drug to slowly wake me and Michel backs out of the room, standing in the shadows to make sure I do awaken. When the doctor nods to him, Michel knows it's time. Everything is in place to move me from the safe house once I'm stable. I'll go to the cottage in Ipswich where my foster parents wait for my return.
He leaves the room, the house, the neighborhood. Driving away, his intention to never see me again is firm even as his heart breaks. He thinks briefly of killing himself as a way to ensure he never comes back but now, in his transcended state, nothing but Soren's own hand can kill him.
He thinks of a way to achieve just that end. He must find a way to destroy both Soren and himself so that neither can threaten me. Planning this is the one thing that will keep Michel away from me, and will keep him from just immersing himself into one of the stasis tanks at the SCU for the next century, until he knows for certain I'm dead and gone.
We part minds and my face is resting in the crook of Michel's neck, my tears on his skin. I touch the ornate gold crucifix on a chain around my neck.
Michel gave this to me…
I sit up and look into his eyes, shaking my head, unable to speak. He tried so hard to avoid this. I can't blame him. I can't hate him, despite all the lies and omissions since we met. They were all motivated by a desire to be good, to be strong, to do the right thing. I'll stay with him, despite what I've read and his role in everything. All the lies – what do they mean when compared to his love?
Finally, I kiss him again because I know he's waiting to see my response, and when I do, I feel relief flood through him and he chokes up for a moment, pulling away from our kiss.
"I'm so sorry about everything," he says, his voice breaking. "I'll make it up to you. We'll stay here, away from that life. You'll study music. We'll move away, go to Wales if you want."
"No. I can't leave. We're going to find a way to stop Soren."
"No, no ," he says. "Not after this."
"Yes," I say. "It's our duty. You know that. We can't run away."
He just shakes his head. When he starts to speak again, I silence him with another kiss, not letting him try to talk me out of it. Now that I know the whole story, how can I be selfish and ignore my responsibility? I don't let him pull away from me when he tries, and instead, I grind myself against him, my hands pulling him closer.
"I need you now ," I say, kissing him, and I can feel his immediate response to the sound of need in my voice.
He can't resist me. I'm counting on it.
I pull my nightgown over my head and press my naked body against him and he gives in, running his hands down my back to my buttocks, which he grabs and squeezes, pulling me against his erection.
"Oh, God, Eve …"
I know he didn’t believe this would end the way it has and hope fills him as I move to the side so he can remove his briefs. I can't wait to feel him inside me, for I know that when we join, I'll feel his desire along with my own and I won't need much to have an orgasm. He holds himself for me as I lower myself onto him, gasping with pleasure as he fills me so completely, stretching me, and I clench around him. He strokes my breasts, rubs my nipples between his thumb and fingers, watching my face as I start to ride him, the combined sensations of me on him and him in me so intense.
Then, he runs his nail along the skin on his neck and a thin line of blood seeps from the wound.
"Feed from me," he says, and I stare at the blood. I read about doing this in the journal, but since we've been together, I have only consumed blood from the vial he provided me. I hesitate, but then I cover the wound with my mouth and suck and his body shudders from the pleasure. When the blood hits my brain, I'm in another place with him, and that place is pure pleasure that seems to go on and on…
I know