Rebecca's Rashness Read Online Free Page A
Author: Lauren Baratz-Logsted
say two-eighths?"
"I hope you're all spending your summer studying math, lying in hammocks, and staring up at clouds," the Mr. McG said.
"We have to go now," Durinda said.
"Bye!" Jackie said.
It was always so odd, seeing educators outside of school.
"Did you notice the Mr. McG was holding the McG's hand?" Durinda giggled. "It was so sweet. Of course, I'm mostly never sure if they even like each other."
"Does it seem to you like everyone in the world is here today?" Jackie wondered.
"If Petal were here right now," Durinda said, "she'd probably say, 'Oh no! If everyone in the world is here today, then all the evil people must be here too!' "
Yes. Yes, she would.
***
We all finally met up at the line of registers.
"What do you think of making fresh-squeezed orange juice this week?" Annie asked Durinda.
"Are you sure we can't find room in our house for one small birdcage?" Petal asked.
"I've finally calculated how many square inches various items in this store take up," Marcia said, "just in case anyone wants to know."
"Can someone help me get this bag of kibble on the conveyor belt?" Zinnia asked, struggling under the weight of it.
"We saw the McG and the Mr. McG holding hands," Jackie said.
"It was shockingly sweet," Durinda said.
"We saw the Wicket hogging up all the fruitcake," Georgia said.
"But I'm pretty sure our mere presence scared her off," Rebecca said, dropping an armload of cans of pink frosting into Zinnia's giganto cart. Then she added, "Why is this line taking so long? Don't people realize I need to get home in order to—"
That's the moment we noticed the back of the head of the person standing in front of us, a hairless head, like one of the eggs from the carton last night before Rebecca cracked it open and drank it raw.
Principal Freud.
Or should we say Frank Freud, since he was no longer our principal.
"I thought you said he was going to Australia," Annie said in an urgent hushed whisper to Jackie.
"He was," Jackie said. "He did."
But evil always returned. We should have known that by now. It happened with Crazy Serena, it happened with the Wicket, and now it was happening with Frank Freud.
Just when you think it's safe to go shopping again...
Frank Freud must have sensed sixteen eyes staring at the back of his head, because he turned then.
We were sure he was shocked to see us there. And we were sure that he was really shocked to see Annie wearing a man's suit, a fedora, and a false mustache.
But we knew he wouldn't rat her out. Like all evil people we'd encountered, he'd learned to be somewhat fearful of us.
Still, running out of food, running into the Wicket, running into Frank Freud...
What else could possibly go wrong in our world today?
FOUR
"You know what's odd?" Annie said after we were all safely buckled in and she'd put the key in the ignition and started the car.
"Let's see," Marcia said, "odd ... well, there's one, of course, and then there's three, five, you wouldn't want to forget seven, and then nine, eleven—"
"You," Rebecca added with a sneer toward Marcia, cutting off the numerical onslaught.
"Yes," Annie conceded, "half the numbers in the world and Marcia are odd, as are we all, but what I was referring to was the smoke pouring out the back of the Hummer."
"Smoke!" Petal screamed, unbuckling herself and throwing her little body from the car. "We're on fire!"
Petal's reaction may have been viewed as extreme by some people—okay, by all of us—but the smoke pouring out of the back of the Hummer was alarming, meaning that even the bravest among us eventually flung her body from the Hummer.
"I wonder if it has anything to do with that pinging noise I heard earlier?" Marcia said, scratching her head.
"We're all going to die!" Petal screamed, hurling her little body to the ground and covering her head with her hands, causing passersby to stare at us.
"This is bad," Jackie said. And for Jackie to say that, we all realized, it must be bad. "For the Hummer to
"I hope you're all spending your summer studying math, lying in hammocks, and staring up at clouds," the Mr. McG said.
"We have to go now," Durinda said.
"Bye!" Jackie said.
It was always so odd, seeing educators outside of school.
"Did you notice the Mr. McG was holding the McG's hand?" Durinda giggled. "It was so sweet. Of course, I'm mostly never sure if they even like each other."
"Does it seem to you like everyone in the world is here today?" Jackie wondered.
"If Petal were here right now," Durinda said, "she'd probably say, 'Oh no! If everyone in the world is here today, then all the evil people must be here too!' "
Yes. Yes, she would.
***
We all finally met up at the line of registers.
"What do you think of making fresh-squeezed orange juice this week?" Annie asked Durinda.
"Are you sure we can't find room in our house for one small birdcage?" Petal asked.
"I've finally calculated how many square inches various items in this store take up," Marcia said, "just in case anyone wants to know."
"Can someone help me get this bag of kibble on the conveyor belt?" Zinnia asked, struggling under the weight of it.
"We saw the McG and the Mr. McG holding hands," Jackie said.
"It was shockingly sweet," Durinda said.
"We saw the Wicket hogging up all the fruitcake," Georgia said.
"But I'm pretty sure our mere presence scared her off," Rebecca said, dropping an armload of cans of pink frosting into Zinnia's giganto cart. Then she added, "Why is this line taking so long? Don't people realize I need to get home in order to—"
That's the moment we noticed the back of the head of the person standing in front of us, a hairless head, like one of the eggs from the carton last night before Rebecca cracked it open and drank it raw.
Principal Freud.
Or should we say Frank Freud, since he was no longer our principal.
"I thought you said he was going to Australia," Annie said in an urgent hushed whisper to Jackie.
"He was," Jackie said. "He did."
But evil always returned. We should have known that by now. It happened with Crazy Serena, it happened with the Wicket, and now it was happening with Frank Freud.
Just when you think it's safe to go shopping again...
Frank Freud must have sensed sixteen eyes staring at the back of his head, because he turned then.
We were sure he was shocked to see us there. And we were sure that he was really shocked to see Annie wearing a man's suit, a fedora, and a false mustache.
But we knew he wouldn't rat her out. Like all evil people we'd encountered, he'd learned to be somewhat fearful of us.
Still, running out of food, running into the Wicket, running into Frank Freud...
What else could possibly go wrong in our world today?
FOUR
"You know what's odd?" Annie said after we were all safely buckled in and she'd put the key in the ignition and started the car.
"Let's see," Marcia said, "odd ... well, there's one, of course, and then there's three, five, you wouldn't want to forget seven, and then nine, eleven—"
"You," Rebecca added with a sneer toward Marcia, cutting off the numerical onslaught.
"Yes," Annie conceded, "half the numbers in the world and Marcia are odd, as are we all, but what I was referring to was the smoke pouring out the back of the Hummer."
"Smoke!" Petal screamed, unbuckling herself and throwing her little body from the car. "We're on fire!"
Petal's reaction may have been viewed as extreme by some people—okay, by all of us—but the smoke pouring out of the back of the Hummer was alarming, meaning that even the bravest among us eventually flung her body from the Hummer.
"I wonder if it has anything to do with that pinging noise I heard earlier?" Marcia said, scratching her head.
"We're all going to die!" Petal screamed, hurling her little body to the ground and covering her head with her hands, causing passersby to stare at us.
"This is bad," Jackie said. And for Jackie to say that, we all realized, it must be bad. "For the Hummer to
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