Out Of Bounds (Balls To The Walls) Read Online Free Page B

radio played in the background.
    It took exactly twenty-four minutes for my greatest fear to be confirmed. I was watching the big circular clock posted on the doctor’s office wall. As soon as we stepped into the waiting room my eyes scanned the bland stiff decor. The clock was mounted on the wall much too high for the purpose of telling time. Kari signed the clipboard at the front desk and made small talk with the receptionist. I took a seat and pretended to read the parenting magazine with the little black boy with blue eyes on the cover. This toddler cover model had dark brown skin. But his eyes were bluer than mine. What would a child with Kari and I look like? Shit ! What would a child of Kari and Jack’s look like?
    I hoped this visit wouldn’t take a long time. But really what was the rush , nine months is a mighty long time. I was all over the place with my thoughts, my emotions, my fucked up fears. I hated feeling this way. My eyes gravitated to the two other people in the quaint modern but stale waiting room area with the stiff ass decor.
    There was a young Mexican girl in gray sweats that looked like a teenager, maybe fifteen. Fifteen was just me being generous. She actually looked like a pubescent twelve-year old with a huge pregnant belly. The girl’s mother was sitting next to her with a major scowl. I had to push my face back into the magazine to stop from staring. I guess I could have kept staring. The young girl’s face was blissfully engrossed in her cell phone and the mother was staring into space like she was in a coma. If my ladybug were a pregnant teen I would probably have the same look.
    Sooner than I imagined I followed my wife back to the examination room. She left the room briefly to be weighed and to pee in a cup. It was confirmed that she was indeed pregnant. FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! I felt the old Asian doctor’s glare as Kari introduced me as her husband. That is I, the husband. But am I the father of her child? If only Dr. Kim could pull a paternity test result out of my wife’s vagina.
    There was a thick silence as we rode the elevator down to the ground floor. There was no elevator music in the damn elevator, just silence. What were we supposed to say to each other? It was so early in the pregnancy we just couldn’t be sure who the father was. The car ride home wasn’t better. We sat silently in the Rover, no conversation, no eye contact, no singing along with the radio. We left all the singing up to Katy Perry. She was belting out Dark Horse .
    The baby news was not good news. The baby news should have made us closer, made us a happy couple. But it was putting a communication wedge in between us. I was not able to communicate my feelings for fear I would hurt Kari. This is real karma for a cocky motherfucker like me. This shit hurts me deeply. Can I even realistically hope this baby is mine? Can this baby be mine?  Kari wasn’t talking but I caught her with a pen, paper and a calendar. I knew what she was up too. She was trying to figure out the provability of me being the father. She was counting the days in her head. She was frustrated and I knew better than to bother her.
    We finally made it home and we both went upstairs to the bedroom. I thought about leaving her alone in the bedroom but I lingered around.
    I was on a mission to stay out of her way. I wasn’t sure where her head was. I wasn’t sure if she was going to blame me for this entire fiasco. If I’m not the father I’m not sure I’m ready to hear that information today. So I will keep my distance until I feel the coast is clear. Or when the coast is not quite so blazing foggy.
    I thought I was going to keep my trap shut but then my big mouth got in the way of my common sense.
    “So what, you giving me the silent treatment?” I asked. Why did I ask?
    “Mason please, I’m not in the mood.”
    I chuckled. She wasn’t in the mood. “Huh, what the fuck does that mean?”
    “Why are you cussing at me?”
    “Why are