Odds on Oliver Read Online Free Page A

president,” Arthur replied.
    â€œYou’re a know-it-all, Arthur,” Oliver said. “Know that?”
    They had almost reached the trap when Edna went wild. She barked like a wild thing and chased her tail round and round in circles.
    â€œI told you, it’s a cougar!” Arthur said.
    â€œSmells like skunk to me,” Oliver said.
    As they crept closer Oliver said, “Don’t scare him. Else he’ll spray us.”
    It was a skunk, a very unfriendly skunk, that they had trapped.
    Slowly, carefully, Oliver inched up to the trap and released the catch so the skunk could go free.
    â€œTake off, bozo,” Oliver told the skunk.
    The skunk waddled halfway out of the trap, looking to the left, then the right.
    Edna barked and bobbed and weaved, like a prizefighter looking for some action.
    She got it.
    Carefully, the skunk took aim and fired.
    â€œWhoa!” Oliver ducked, too late. Heroes never got sprayed by skunks. Heroes never ducked either, he was sure.
    Arthur clutched his chest as if he’d been shot.
    Edna leaped high in the air and came down like a stone.
    â€œThat smell makes my eyes smart,” Arthur said.
    â€œToo bad it missed the rest of you,” Oliver said. He felt shriveled and sad and unheroic.
    Edna only whimpered.
    â€œWhat’ll we do, Ol?” Arthur said.
    â€œFake it,” Oliver decided. “We just pretend nothing happened.”
    â€œYou think anyone will buy that?”
    â€œProbably not,” Oliver said.
    Edna lay on her back, all four feet sticking straight up in the air.
    â€œYou think she’s dead, Ol?” Arthur said.
    â€œNah, she only wishes she were,” Oliver said.

8
    T OMATO -J UICE B ATH
    Oliver’s mom smelled them coming. She met them at the door.
    â€œGet out of those clothes and into the tub,” she said. “All three of you. Yes, Edna, that means you too.”
    â€œClose your eyes,” Oliver’s dad said. “This is for your own good. Ours, too.”
    Oliver’s mom and dad emptied four restaurant-size cans of tomato juice on the heads of Oliver, Arthur, and Edna.
    â€œSometimes this does the trick,” Oliver’s dad said.
    â€œIf it doesn’t work this time,” Oliver’s mom said, “I don’t know what we’ll do.”
    â€œLock ’em up in the woodshed until the Fourth of July party’s over,” Oliver’s dad said.
    â€œThe show must go on,” Oliver said.
    â€œWhy?” asked Arthur.
    In the morning, they still smelled of skunk.
    â€œWooeee,” said one of the men who was at the Blue Burd putting up the party tent. “You guys are pretty ripe. He got you good, huh?”
    â€œHey, boys,” another man said, “you take yourselves a bath in tomato juice. That’ll fix you up. That’s the ticket, tomato juice.”
    â€œWe already did,” Oliver said.
    â€œI can hardly see,” Arthur complained, squinting into the sun. “I got skunk and tomato juice in my eyes and my ears and up my nose. My mom said to get out of the house or she might go crazy.”
    â€œBetter make yourselves scarce when the guests start arriving,” Oliver’s dad said. “Lay low and hope the wind’s blowing in the right direction.”
    â€œDon’t forget, Ol, keep an eye on U. Crumm,” Arthur said. “This is your big chance to be a hero. The minute she starts choking—on account of she doesn’t chew each bite fifteen times like you’re supposed to—get in there and start squeezing. And we split the reward for saving her life fifty-fifty. This is it, Ol. Your big chance. Try not to blow it, like you did all the other times.”
    â€œAll what other times?” Oliver said, on the defensive.
    â€œWell …” Arthur began ticking off on his fingers. “When you went to rescue me from drowning and I could already touch bottom. Number one. Then the checkout girl