Odd Girl Read Online Free Page B

embarrassedly, but relieved. She sat nearer to him and said, "Tell me more about the Oval. Do girls really go there?"
    "Mostly drag," he nodded.
    "Drag?" she had often wanted to ask what he meant by that. The rest of the cast seemed to know.
    "With men's clothes on. You know—tough," he said.
    Anne smiled. "Now I know another word."
    They both felt that they were friends and Jacques spoke more freely of himself. He was in love with a boy named Gene who would have nothing to do with him. Jacques chased him from one bar to the next and made good friends along the way. Then he spoke of other things, news of- the cast and how Anne had been missed at rehearsals and how her replacement was just a dog. And then there was a long silence again and Anne spoke slowly. "Do you know of better places than the Oval?"
    He shook his head. "I'm the wrong one to ask—brave the joint some night and ask one of the waitresses."
    "Thanks," she said, "I guess I'll work up the courage one of these days."
    When he was gone she looked out of her window for a while, toward the Oval, trying to make out in the dark whether the figures entering were men or women.
    * * *
    "Hi, there!" Beth came first up the stairs and took both Anne's hands and looked at her. "You look wonderful." Mark, coming behind her, looked approvingly up and down and said, "What's your tonic?"
    "Freedom," Anne said. "Come on in." Indeed, she felt free. Her talk with Jacques the day before had given her new assurance and she had prepared for their visit with great calm—a new sensation for her; she was usually paralyzed with expectation.
    "This is a wonderful place, Anne," Beth said. She seemed more excited than usual—Anne wondered if Mark had told her about them. She was making a great effort to be friends.
    "Just a sublet," Anne said, then took their coats.
    "Only a block from the theater," Mark noticed. "It's tailor made. Gosh, Anne, I hope you're coming back."
    "No," she said, "I don't want to act anymore."
    "Hey, that's a shame." Beth went to her, took her hands again and squeezed them tightly. "You've got real talent."
    "I'm sorry," Anne said. She avoided looking at Beth's face. "Can I pour you drinks?"
    They nodded and went to sit on the day couch, but on opposite sides instead of closely. Anne felt Beth knew about Mark. She behaved as if she knew and had decided to leave Mark for her—as if Anne were in greater need of him. How awful, Anne thought, I don't want him. How can I tell her this? And how can I convince Mark?
    She brought their drinks and they chatted and Beth laughed more than usual. Her composure was tarnished at the edges, Anne thought. She also drank four martinis within the allotted hour of their stay and when she got up to straighten her skirt and say "Well, let's go," she was wobbling slightly.
    "Come back soon." Impulsively Anne took her hands and looked deeply into her eyes. Beth looked away and said, "Thanks."
    Mark brought their coats and there was nothing more for Anne to say except the usual goodbyes. Mark gave her a meaningful glance as they left.
    Now the door was shut and Anne was alone and she felt a dreadful tearing in her stomach and she knew the reaction had finally come. Beth still attracted her, despite Mark and the talk with Jacques, and even despite Beth.
    There could be no relief. She would lie in bed all night with her eyes fixed on the ceiling, picturing Beth, in the way she had dreamed in adolescence, of arms and thighs locking in long embraces. There could be no relief.
    The phone's ringing startled her from her reverie. She knew it was Mark.
    "It's late to call, Mark," she said.
    "When can I see you?" he insisted.
    "I don't want to hurt Beth," she said.
    "Beth and I are through," he said emphatically.
    "I don't want you, Mark," she sighed.
    "I want to see you," he said. "Be right over."
    Before she could answer him he had hung up, and in a matter of minutes he was in the apartment. She tried to explain, though she knew it was