Luz: book i: comings and goings (Troubled Times 1) Read Online Free Page B

setting in, I couldn’t tell. But I felt sorry for Rigo. At times he was a wounded and innocent little boy, and I must learn to go easy on him, listen compassionately. I kissed him on the mouth with all the feeling I could summon.
    “Let’s celebrate,” I said. “Let’s do it right now as long as we’ve got the house to ourselves. Let’s make love for the last time in this homeland of ours.”
    “Right now?” he asked, his eyes darkening with ruggedness and lust.
    “Right now,” I replied.
    He didn’t decline my offer, of course. We made glorious and wondrous love, the last vestiges of dusk giving way to a nascent night, and light fusing into darkness with the feel and finesse of a fluctuating flame. I never felt closer to Rigo or more passionate about him than during our union that particular dusk. Partial darkness glowed with the frenzy of desire and distant points of light were all that I saw. When we finished I wanted him to love me over and over again. I wanted this dusk of desire to last forever and for Rigo to hold me and never let go. We lay in bed and I wanted desperatelyto stayed glued to him, but he had more pressing matters on his mind.
    “I need to tell my parents,” he said. “I need to break the news to Mamá.”
    “Right now? You have to do that right now?”
    “
Coño mija
, I have to tell them sometime, don’t I? We’re leaving tomorrow.”
    He was right, and I knew it. As much as I wanted to hold on and never let go, Rigo was a practical man. He had to notify his parents and get it over with. I didn’t want to think about my mother-in-law or how she would pin this on me.
    “All right,” I said. “I understand, amor. Go ahead.”
    Rigo slipped out of my arms and out of bed, and while I contentedly stayed put, he quickly threw his clothes on in all their splendid drabness. But I couldn’t move. I continued on my side even though he was right: we had a lot to do, a lot to finalize. A restless and nervous energy stirred, but I sealed it off, closing my eyes and managing to drift off when his voice rudely awakened me. I found him sitting on the edge of the bed gently stroking my hair.
    “I just want to tell you one more thing, amor, and remember this while I’m gone.”
    “What?”
    “You know me, amor. You know that when I make up my mind about something, it’s do or die, that I don’t go back on things.”
    “I know, Rigo. Why are you saying this?”
    “Because, amor, as of this moment I’m committed—we’re committed. We go through with this no matter what. No backing out.”
    “
Me back out? I won’t back out, amor. I’m the one who just convinced you. The one who’s been hounding you for three days.”
    That peevish and playful smile returned to his face. “Allright, amor, all right. I just want you to respect how I feel.”
    “I do, Rigo. You be the one to remember that when your mother is throwing a fit.”
    He’d had enough of me. Rigo bent over and kissed me goodbye, but I wouldn’t let go of him. He had to peel me off of him. After some wrangling he finally freed himself and wasted no time in grabbing his wallet and watch and departing from the pale rust walls of our room.
    “Be strong!” I called out after him. “Remember your own words when your mother tries talking you out of this. You know she’s going to put up a fight, and a fierce one.”
    He responded not, but it didn’t matter. I knew what the response would have been. Rigo’s mother could never do any wrong. He stayed his course in silence and made his way down the narrow hall, reaching the front door and opening it softly. Rigo’s family lived close by, and I hoped this wouldn’t take long. I had longed for night’s arrival, but our hated
apagón
—our nightly blackout—would soon go into effect, and I dreaded being alone in the house during the hours of blackness.
    He was gone. From my bed I heard the front door close, but inside I felt another door open. We were leaving Cuba. We were